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Puberty (Opening)

Man
I woke up with something
Sticky
In my bed
And the thought of my
Babysitter
Kayla in my head

Madison C.
Never knew where my
Uterus was
Before
But now I feel a cramp
I can't ignore

Man, Trish, Lucas, and Madison
Puberty (training bra)
Puberty (body hair)
It's bad for you
And it's bad for me (hormones)
Puberty
Puberty

Man with Glasses
Please take this boner
Away
From me

A Late Bloomer's Lament

Trish
Madison was
So mean to her mom
Today in carpool
If only my hormones
Were racing like hers
God, that would be so cool

Madison
Mom, you're so stupid!

Trish
If only
I could be a woman
Like that
Grown enough
To yell at a boomer
But my boobies are flat
And my pits have no hair

Madison
No hair

Trish
I'm just
A pathetic
Late bloomer

Madison
I wish I was never born!

Grown Men

Lucas
I just started smellin' like
A grown ass man
Not gonna ruin I
With deodorant
Mom, stop pushin

Man with Glasses
And I just wanna
Put my dick
Into something
It doesn't matter
What it could be
Couch cushion

Man, Man with Glasses, and Lucas
We're grown men

Man
Angry and horny
And nothing else

Man, Man with Glasses, and Lucas
We're grown men

Man with Glasses
I got one hair
On the tip of my dick

I Like Like You

Trish
Madison thinks
That Brant is cool
Does Brant even know
That she goes to this school

Lucas
Wait,
Madison C.
Or Madison L?

Trish
Madison C.
Who is Madison L?

Lucas

She's in Rachel's homeroom
And she does
Karate

Trish
Oh, that's cool, but no
Madison C. wanted
To ask Brant out

Lucas
Well, Brant
Like-likes Madison C,
But had doubts

Trish
Well, Madison C.
Like-likes Brant
But she was too
Afraid he wouldn't
Go to the dance

Lucas
Brant can be dropped off
At her house

Trish and Lucas
At 6 PM
That would be perfect
For them

Acne

Acne
I am the acne, attack me
You will never whack me
Can't escape my bumpy shape
Not even with Cerave

Zit
I'm a zit, man
s***, man
You're gonna need a hit man
I'm overactive, unattractive
Better get that bitch Proactive

Acne
We poppin' up

Zit
We poppin' up

Zit and Acne
Medical acne

Health Class Horror

Teacher
Herpes from a
Kiss on the lips
Touching mouths
And that could be it
Gonorrhea
HIV
Here's the list
Of STDs
These are STDs
These are STDs
These are STDs
STDs
STDs
STDs
STDs
STDs
Raaaaaaah!

The Menstrual Blues

Trish
It's too scary
How do people do this?
I can't find the hole
I don't know where to put it in

Maxi Pad
Comfort should be the goal

Trish
Maxi Pad?

Maxi Pad
Trish, there's no shame in using me.
Sure, I feel like a diaper, but-

Tampon
You're not a baby, are you?

Trish
Tampon?

Tampon
Only pussies use pads.

Trish
That's a really confusing sentence.

Tampon
Slide me up
Just prod around
The hole was lost
But
It will be found
'Cause I got a
Big, sexy
Cardboard
Applicator

Leave Room for Me

Jesus
This is how we dance
Appropriately
Put your arms out
Like a mummy
Now turn face to face
But
Don't hold each other close
Push each other away
Leave room for me
Leave room for me
This is how people
Get pregnant
Leave room for me

Finale

Man with Glasses
I got
A boner
In class

Trish, Lucas, Teacher, Madison, and Man
In class

Man with Glasses
Ah

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