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"And I said hey! (Hey!) What a wonderful kind of day! SHUT UP!"

If Cartoons Were Real is a Smosh video uploaded on July 30, 2010 and is the third installment in the If...Were Real series. Various cartoons and comics are put into real-life situations, often with humorous results.

Plot

Introduction

Ian and Anthony are watching SpongeBob SquarePants. Patrick asks SpongeBob if he wants another Krabby Patty, and SpongeBob replies, "Sure, Patrick!" and does his infamous laugh. Ian complains that no one would like a burger that's been underwater, because then it'd be "all soggy and disgusting." Anthony tells Ian to imagine how cartoons would suck if they were actually realistic.

Cartoons Spoofed

Pokemon

Ash (Ian) asks Brock (Anthony) if he wants to see a "cute rat little animal" he caught this morning. However, when the Ash opens the ball, all they see is a crushed and bloodied Pikachu. Both scream in horror.

Peanuts

A teacher (KassemG) is talking to some kids (Anthony, Ian and Ryan Higa), but sounds like the teacher from the Peanuts cartoon. However, after the kids stare in confusion, the teacher speaks normally and reveals he is just joking, saying that "those aren't even real words."

Captain Planet and the Planeteers

Captain Planet (Anthony) asks some kids if they want to save the planet. Ian remembers Captain Planet from somewhere, and a flashback begins. Captain Planet walks in with a bag of wine coolers and candy while a woman says "I'm in the back. C'mon in." Ian walks in wearing a suit (and acting like Chris Hansen) and asks Captain Planet to take a seat. Planet flees in terror.

South Park

Stan Marsh (Ian) profusely apologizes to his mom while being forced to lick a bar of soap for cursing.

The Simpsons

Homer (Ian) tells Bart (Anthony) to take out the trash. Bart replies, "eat my shorts." Homer strangles Bart. Afterwards, a neswpaper shows that Homer is in jail for twenty years due to child abuse.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

April is being attacked by the evil Shredder (a paper shredder), and asks Raphael to help. Raphael (as a regular turtle) is sitting nearby, nibbling on a slice of pepperoni pizza, and lets out a weak chirp.

Dragon Ball Z

Ian attempts a Kamehameha, but fails. Anthony asks him how many times he has tried it and Ian sadly replies, "over nine thousand."

Invader Zim

"We don't know anything about Invader Zim. So here's a waffle." A waffle is shown, and GIR appears on the waffle.

He-Man

He-Man (Anthony) exclaims, "By the power of Grayskull, I am He-Man!" A guy walks by and tells him "Gay bar's that way."

Inspector Gadget

A robber (Anthony) tries to rob Inspector Gadget (Ian), but Gadget tries to stop him by spraying him with a web shooter, saying "go go gadget web shooter." The robber then shoots Inspector Gadget, saying "go go gadget gun."

Deleted Scenes

Scooby Doo!

The gang is walking in a hallway trying to find a person called "The Jigsaw Killer." Shaggy descibes the things he has done to two people such as making a man cut off one of his own limbs with a saw and disemboweling his friend with a meat cleaver. Everyone except Shaggy, slightly disgusted, look at each other. Velma suggests they all get ice cream and both Fred and Daphne agree.

Doug

Doug (lan) is on the phone and asks Skeeter "what he thinks." Then Skeeter (Anthony) appears. Doug screams: "WHY THE F**K ARE YOU BLUE?!"

Ending

Ian decides to grill burgers, saying "burger" with a really bad Australian accent, which Ian claims is a "Steve Irwin accent." Ian is shown outside, with his burger, smelling it. However, he trips on Shredder and drops the burger in a bucket of water. Ian remembers what he said earlier and picks up the soggy burger out of the water. He takes a bite, and exclaims, "THIS IS AMAZING!"

Script

If Cartoons Were Real/Script

Trivia/Goofs

  • Although part of the TV show Arthur's theme song is in the "Shut Up!" intro, the show is not parodied in the episode.
  • The Captain Planet scene is similar to Dateline's To Catch a Predator.
  • This is the second of four appearances of Ian as Chris Hansen. The first is "New Moon Deleted Scene 1". The third is in If Kids Shows Were Real The fourth is in a deleted scene of If Movies Were Real 2
  • The Captain Planet sketch has a connection to the Pee-Wee's Big Adventure in If Kids Shows Were Real
  • Captain Planet emphasizes environment conservation, but he is seen driving a truck, which gives off pollution.
  • In the Doug deleted scene, Ian (playing Doug Funnie) screams "WHY THE F**K ARE YOU BLUE?!" to Skeeter, even though in the Original Nickelodeon Series, Skeeter's Skin was a lightish Blue-Green
    • Anthony mentions Doug Funnie again in a deleted scene from Food Battle 2012, in his line: "(Various coughing/dying/choking sounds).....Doug Funnie"
  • In the DragonBall Z segment, lan tells Anthony he's tried the move over nine thousand times, referencing the "OVER 9000!!!!!!!" Meme.
  • During the start of the Captain Planet scene, Ian is discussing the 'Double Rainbow' video.
  • This is the first and so far the only "If...Were Real" episode to feature a franchise from a previous episode, this being Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
    • Two years later, in 2012, Nickelodeon would release Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles as a newly animated series.

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See Also

v - e - d
Smosh logo(2005-2009): If It Were Real Series
Season 2009
Episode 1 If Movies Were Real
Season 2010
Episode 2 to 3 If Video Games Were Real  ยท If Scary Movies Were Real!
Season 2011
Episode 4 to 8 IF KIDS SHOWS WERE REAL!  ยท If Superheroes Were Real!  ยท IF THE INTERNET WAS REAL  ยท IF MOVIES WERE REAL 2  ยท IF HOLIDAYS WERE REAL
Season 2012
Episode 9 to 10 IF VIDEO GAMES WERE REAL 2  ยท IF TV SHOWS WERE REAL
Season 2013
Episode 11 IF MOVIES WERE REAL 3
Season 2014
Episode 12 to 14 IF VIDEO GAMES WERE REAL 3  ยท IF APPS WERE REAL  ยท IF TV SHOWS WERE REAL 2
Season 2015
Episode 15 to 17 IF ROMANTIC MOVIES WERE REAL  ยท IF BOARD GAMES WERE REAL  ยท IF VIDEO GAMES WERE REAL 4
Season 2016
Episode 18 to 20 IF REALITY SHOWS WERE REAL  ยท IF DISNEY PRINCESSES WERE REAL  ยท IF VIDEO GAMES WERE REAL 5
Season 2017
Episode 21 to 23 IF BOARD GAMES WERE REAL 2  ยท IF DISNEY MOVIES WERE REAL  ยท IF KIDS SHOWS WERE REAL 2
Season 2018
Episode 24 to 25 IF MOVIES WERE REAL 5  ยท IF SCARY MOVIES WERE REAL 3
Season 2019
Episode 26 to 28 IF MARVEL CHARACTERS WERE REAL  ยท IF TEXTS WERE REAL  ยท If Movies Were Real 6
Season 2020
Episode 29 to 30 If Instagram Were Real  ยท If Animal Crossing Were Real
Season 2021
Episode 31 If Texts Were Real
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