IF YOU HAD ONE WISH... is a Smosh video released on January 22, 2019.
Two volunteers from the leading Wish-A-Dream Charity set out to grant a little boy's wish. They will come to regret this.
- Ian Hecox as Kyle, a Wish-A-Dream Charity employee
- Shayne Topp as Laurel, a Wish-A-Dream Charity employee
- Damien Haas as Jessie Thomas's older brother
- Courtney Miller as Jessie Thomas
- Director: Shayne Topp
- Producer: Ryan Todd
- Writers: Shayne Topp, Damien Haas & Ryan Finnerty
- Director of Photography: Mitch Anderson
- Assistant Camera: Brennan Iketani
- Editor: Ryan Todd
- Sound Mixer: Greg Jones
- Makeup Artist: Rachel Jenkins
The doorbell rings as a young boy (Damien) opens the door to see two employees of the Wish-A-Dream Charity named Kyle (Ian) and Laurel (Shayne). Laurel mentions that the kid, who he assumes is Jessie, the kid they were sent to aid, matches the description for a "real strong, brave kid who gives excellent hi-fives" before extending his palm out for a hi-five, which Jessie does not return. Unfazed, Laurel explains that they are from Wish-A-Dream and have heard of Jessie's illness, and wish to make any wish of his come true. Kyle continues, ending with the Wish-A-Dream motto:
"...because every wish is a dream and it's our job to make every dream-wish come true!"
Jessie confirms if he can wish for "anything" before blankly stating that he wants Kyle to spit peanut butter into Laurel's mouth. After a second of staring in silence, Laurel reiterates that he can wish for anything in the world and urges him to think big, suggesting that he could wish to meet Ed Sheeran, go to Disney World, or play Fortnite with "the Ninja" (while trying to imitate flossing).
Jessie, still deadpan, states that he wishes for an explanation for what kind of God would allow an eight-year-old to feel the kind of pain he does. Jessie quickly mentions that he is kidding before returning to wanting Kyle to fill his mouth with creamy peanut butter and forcefully spit it into Laurel's mouth. When Kyle tries to suggest that he could meet Ed Sheeran.
Laurel tries to explain that, while he and Kyle would love to make Jessie's wish a reality, they can't because they are wish-makers and cannot be part of said wish, as it is against the rules. This visible reluctance causes Jessie to enter a small, guilt-tripping statement:
"I'm dying. My name is Jessie Thomas. I've been alive for eight agonizing years. I'm the first one to have what I have, so doctors just call it "Jessie syndrome". Everything hurts. I scream when I poop. My hands are all weird. My bones are way too loud. The other day, I hiccupped, and just... bubbles. I always want to run around and play basketball like the other kids, but I can't because going too fast will make my heart explode sooner. When my mom said that people were coming to make my dreams come true, I finally understood this emotion of "joy" people keep talking about. But I was wrong. You guys can't grant my wishes. It's okay. I'm used to disappointment."
As Jessie turns to head back inside, Kyle and Laurel, now guilty, agree to do it, reciting the Wish-A-Dream motto. Jessie smirks and holds up a jar of peanut butter. Surprised that he already has a jar ready, Kyle takes it, and the two Wish-A-Dream employees proceed to do exactly what Jessie described in his wish. The camera remains on Jessie's smirking face for nearly a minute as Laurel and Kyle quickly struggle with the task, but they finish. Much to their dismay, however, Jessie pulls out a second jar of peanut butter.
The camera switches to various shots of the surrounding houses and street, showing how far away Kyle and Laurel's struggling cries can be heard. When they are finished, Kyle and Laurel are covered in peanut butter. Kyle and Laurel barely utter to Jessie that they made his wish come true before Jessie simply state that he is not Jessie, rather her older brother. He calls for the real Jessie (Courtney), who excitedly arrives. The real Jessie's wish is to meet Ed Sheeran as Kyle and Laurel start to scream and cry.
"Well, there it is: the weirdest thing you've probably ever seen on the Internet. If you're a big ol' stupid dum-dum, click that box on the left, and is sometimes you pee yourself just to feel warm, click that box on the right. See ya later!"
- Main article: IF YOU HAD ONE WISH.../Script
- From Smosh in the comments, pinned: "I be flossin"
- The Smosh team ran into some unspecified technical difficulties the day the video was scheduled to be released, so it was released 9AM PST the next day (Tuesday) instead.
- This video marks the first time Shayne has directed a video.
- This marks the first time a member of the Smosh Games Crew has recorded a video for a Smosh channel since Smosh is Homeless and the closure of Defy Media.
- While shooting the video, they filmed the actual act of spitting peanut butter in each other's mouths. This footage didn't make it into the official cut, and it was theorized by Damien on a twitch stream that they didn't put it in because of how gross it looked. Shayne would later release the footage on twitter, just a few minutes after Damien had spoken about it on stream.
- This video was on Damien's Top 5 Smosh Videos list in the 31st episode of SmoshCast.
- In the same episode, it was revealed that this video as recorded at Courtney's Dad's house.