Harry is attempting to chase after Lord Voldemort, who is escaping in a truck. He jumps up on his broomstick but falls to the ground, crumpled and holding his "English teabags" in pain.
Harry, Ron, and Hermione are in class, taught by Dumbledore. After attendance is called, the students are instructed to read through their textbook, but Harry and Ron are distracted by fantasies about Hermione. Ironically, Dumbledore is distracted as well by fantasies of Harry and Ron.
Harry and Ron are also standing outside when Neville appears and, despite their warnings, tests out a homebrewed potion of bleach and horse hair on himself, which unsurprisingly kills him instead of increasing his muscular mass. Harry and Ron are confused on what to do with Neville's body when Hermione appears and takes the body away to become her new boyfriend.
Harry briefly appears in a couple reenactments of fan fiction, particularly of himself and Dumbledore. A lonely fangirl also fantasizes Harry rescuing her from her miserable life and tongue-kissing her, only to snap back to reality to find herself tongue-kissing a Harry Potter action figure.
- In public school, Harry is a delusional kid who thinks he lives in a magical world.
- Harry is bald, and his lightning scar is only part of a larger form of a penis.
- In Game of Thrones, Harry is quickly killed while trying to negotiate with a giant on the basis of Hagrid's giant blood.
- Harry has an Instagram account and constantly posts selfies and captioned pictures of random things.
- Apple hasn't sold anything in six months as Harry has been happily fixing iPhones for free (Phoneum fixus).
- Harry is a sellout, and his lightning scar is replaced with the Nike swoosh.
- Without his magic, Harry is dead.
- Harry is a stoner, making him lazy enough to Accio anything he needs.
- Harry is embarrassed that his Patronus is a nude Shayne.
- Harry is attacked by a snake after a conversation gone awry in Parseltongue.
- Harry is reckless with his mental connection with Voldemort and uses his dead parents as an excuse for anything.
- Harry finds it ridiculous that a permission slip is only required to visit Hogsmeade of all things.
- Harry doesn't know any spell other than the Disarming Charm (Expelliarmus).
|If It Were Real||If Movies Were Real|
|Smosh||HARRY POTTER DELETED SCENES!|
|THE HARRY POTTER PILL!|
|The Big What If||WHAT IF HARRY POTTER...|
|Every Blank Ever||EVERY HARRY POTTER EVER|