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EVERY CHURCH EVER is a Smosh main channel upload. The video topic had been frequently requested.

Synopsis[]

Churches - whether it's the big fancy hats, the super passionate preachers, and more - this is Every Church Ever!

EVERY_CHURCH_EVER

EVERY CHURCH EVER

Thumbnail with the play button

Plot:

The first clip shows a female Sunday school instructor (played by Courtney Miller) who reads a story to the children about God's spirit and how he created many things. A boy named Alfie (played by Peter Gilroy) tells everyone that his dad says God is not real. The teacher ignores him and continues on with the story. Alfie interrupts again, saying that his dad stated God is not real for the second time. The teacher grows irritated, but continues reading the book. Alfie interuppts for the third time, this time he asks how they can understand, since language wasn't invented during that time. The teacher grows kind of frustrated and tells Alfie to raise his hand if he has something to share with everyone. Alfie does so, when the teacher calls on him, Alfie, again, says that God is not real. The teacher grows impatient and tells Alfie not to make her job so hard, which is keeping everyone's attention. Alfie suggests having something to "sweeten" the deal, to which the teacher hands him some chocolate. All of a sudden, Alfie tells everyone that God IS real.

The second clip shows a priest (played by Ian Hecox) baptizing a baby doll. The scene switches to several rock-star people getting ready to baptize. To which they begin playing a heavy metal song about "Getting dunked by Jesus", with a man (played by Noah Grossman) being dunked into a heavy barrel of water.

The third clip shows a man (also played by Noah Grossman) sitting on a bench, when all of a sudden, a woman (played by Olivia Sui) in a pink outfit (including a slightly huge pink hat) sits in-front of him. The man slides to the middle. When all of a sudden, another woman (played by Courtney Miller) wearing a dark blue outfit (also a slightly huge light-blue hat) sits in the middle, blocking the man's view, he slides to the right (not long before giving her the "Excuse me, wtf?" signal) All is well until a third woman (played by Keith Leak II) wearing all purple comes in with a VERY HUGE purple hat and sits down. The man grows frustrated and shouts "JESUS CHRIST!" very loud. This causes the audience to stand up, with one of the women's hats knocking the man out (without them realizing it)

The fourth clip shows a black pastor (played by Keith Leak II) asking everyone if they're holding hate in their hearts, to which he tells them to look deep into themselves. A man (played by Peter Gilroy) notices a girl (played by Olivia Sui) staring at him for no apparent reason, to which he tries ignoring her. The pastor tells everyone if they feel hate in their hearts, they need to "let it go". Just like Frozen, just let it go. While the pastor is continuing with his speech, the man starts to grow annoyed by the girl staring at him, to which he quietly asks what she wants. The girl strangely smiles at him. The pastor tells everyone to carry God with him. The girl starts to lean in closer to the man's face, to which he grows even more annoyed. The pastor tells everyone to take it all out right here, right now. The man feels the anger rushing through him. He reaches his boiling point when the girl taps his nose, to which he shouts angrily at the top of his lungs "GET AWAY FROM ME!!" Everyone stares at him in shock, including the pastor. The man turns back and tells everyone "Don't touch people in church, right?"

The fifth clip shows the same 3 women (Olivia Sui, Courtney Miller, and Keith Leak II) giving away cash in a small container. When the container reaches the woman in the pink (Olivia Sui), she puts in her money, pearl piercings, and top-dentures inside, the same man (Noah Grossman) says "Jesus Christ" again, causing everyone to stand up and start singing (with one of the women impulsively causing the man to fall onto the floor)

The sixth clip shows 2 men (played by Ian Hecox and Keith Leak II) attending a black church, to which Keith reminds Ian that his church is a bit different, even though Ian has been to church before. Ian begins shouting random stuff, such as "Praaaaise Jesus!", "Ohhh, hell no, Judas!" "You down with G-O-D?!", etc. Ian starts singing the Let it Shine song. Then, Ian starts acting all energetic and claims he "Feels the force", not to be confused with Star Wars. When Ian reaches Keith, he starts to go crazy and acts like he is dying. Keith tells everyone that he's not his "white dude".

The seventh (and final) clip shows the 3 women (again) asking everyone to say their prayers, The woman in pink (Olivia Sui) asks for everyone to pray for her son Robbie who broke his leg and needs recovery fast. The woman in purple (Keith Leak II) asks for everyone to pray for her son Michael who broke both his legs, arms, and is blind in one eye. Then, the woman in blue (Courtney Miller) tells everyone she will be praying for both Michael and Robbie, but needs their most sincere prayers for her son Dennis, who was born with no arms, no legs, his skin is flaking off, is cold all the time, and is only expected to live 9 years old. The man (Noah Grossman) asks her if Dennis is her pet snake, when she says yes, he says "Jesus Christ" for the third time, once again, the audience stands up and sings loudly. This time, the man does not fall, but he does get a bloody nose, which was caused by the woman in blue punching him without thinking about it.

EVERY_CHURCH_EVER

EVERY CHURCH EVER

Every Church Ever

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