|BEST ECLIPSE VIDEO EVER (deleting never)|
August 21, 2017
News reporter Karen Wiltch, Eclipse expert Paul Alberts
The video is a parody of the 2017 Solar Eclipse, which happened the day the video was released. The video fictionally portrayed a live news cast of the 2017 Solar Eclipse as a picture of a 1997 Mitsubishi Eclipse GS glued to a popsicle stick going over the sun.
Cuts to a logo saying "eclispe watch 2017."
Karen: Hello! I'm Karen Welch and we'd like to welcome all of our viewers at home to eclipse watch 2017.
Cuts to a group of people in Salem, Oregon as a countdown begins.
Karen: With me as always is our eclipse expert Paul Alberts.
Cuts to the sky as the sun is seen also.
Paul: Thanks for having me again Karen.
Cuts back to the same group of people as the timer hits 0:00.
Karen: And here comes the eclipse.
Suddenly a 1997 Mitsubishi appears out of the sky.
Paul: Oh wow; it appears to be a 1997 Mitsubishi Eclipse GS.
Karen: Now I do believe that is the ultra red pearl.
Paul: Actually, Karen, it's the it's the cayenne red pearl. The ultra red pearl wasn't introduced to the Mitsubishi until 2003.
Karen: I would like to apologize to our viewers.
Cuts to a map on what people are going to see of the eclipse.
Paul: Let's see the map of the eclipse's trajectory.
Karen: Now Paul, could you tell us what we're seeing here?
Paul: I'd be happy to, Karen.
Zooms in on St. Paul, Minnesota.
Paul: St. Paul, Minnesota will only experience the upper half of the Mitsubishi which features the distinctive offset hood bulge, and a portion of the spolier.
Karen: Spolier alert.
The map then zooms out back to the whole U.S.A.
Paul: Okay, Karen.
The map then zooms in on Houston, Texas.
Paul: And unfortunately, Houston, Texas will only be able to view undercarriage and the optional 5-spoke alloy wheels.
The map then heads up to Lincoln, Nebraska.
Paul: And Lincoln, Nebraska will be able to experience the full majesty of this majestic event. Karen I think now is the perfect time to thank our featured sponser.
Karen: A perfect time indeed.
Cuts to a Readable logo.
Karen: This episode is brought to you by Readable: the service that takes your favorite podcasts, and turns them into books. Paul, I think now is the perfect time to check back with our watch party.
Cuts back to the group of people where the shadow of the Mitsubishi.
Paul: If this were the 3rd generation eclipse, then this would have been much bigger as the U.S Safety Regulations bloated the eclipse's perfectly supple body lines.
Cuts back to the Mitsubishi heading towards the sun.
Karen: In just a few moments the sun will be entirely eclipsed, and we will reach totality.
Paul: I don't know what i'm more exited by. The impending totality, or this 141 horsepower masterpiece of Japanese engineering and style.
Karen: For me, it would have to be totality. Now, let's take a break to thank our other sponser Paul.
Cuts to a Tangible logo.
Paul: We are also brought to you by Tangible. Tangible: taking your favorite audio-books, and turning them into textures.
Karen: One audio book I would recommend touching is Ray Bradbury's Fahrenheit 451.
Paul: Personally, I'd love to touch stuart little.
Cuts back to the sky where the Mitsubishi has covered the sun completely.
Paul: And there we have it, full obstruction
Karen: Have you ever seen anything more spectacular?
Suddently the Mitsubishi begins breaking down.
Karen: Oh dear, it appears the eclipse has broken down over Salem, Oregon.
Paul: One thing that should be mentioned is the 2nd generation eclipse was woefully unreliable.
Cuts back to the group of people as th Mitsubishi shadow still over them.
Paul: Just a real piece of sh*t car, Karen.
Cuts back to the sky with the Mitsubishi still over the sun and a tow truck arrives to pick up the Mitsubishi.
Karen: Oh and it appears a tow truck has arrived at the scene.
Paul: And just in time, as Oregon would have plunged into a perpetual ice age.
The Tow Truck and the Mitsubishi then head off as the sun can be seen again.
Karen: And there goes the eclispe.
Cuts back to the group of people as the shadow begins to leave.
Paul: Gone from our skies, but not our hearts.
Cuts back to the logo Eclipse Watch 2017
Karen: We'd like to thank everyone for tuning into Eclipse Watch 2017 and we would like to invite you to join us as we go to our next live stream.
Cuts to another logo called Tortoise Watch 2017.
Karen: The rare mating ritual of the Galapagos Giant Tortoise, which is already into it's third hour.
Cuts to a Male Tortoise slowly humping a Female Tortoise.
Paul: Oh that is exceptional form.
Karen: Truly majestic.
The Male Tortoise then humps the female Tortoise again and the screen then cuts to black.
Many viewers stated the video was "clickbait". The video gained over 4,000 dislikes in the first 12 hours of it being released.
- This video has the most title changes, at least in a day, in Smosh video history.