Cat Soup/Script

(Video starts with Ian sitting at the dining table, sick and shivering. Anthony approaches him with a bowl of soup)

Anthony: Here, this should make you feel better. *Gives Ian the soup*

Ian: Thanks. I feel like crap.

Anthony: Yeah, so how do you get sick anyway?

Ian: I don't know. *takes a sip of the soup* Well, the other day I was eating this donut, and my mom called.

(Flashback: Ian drops the donut, but he picked up the phone and talks to his mom first)

Ian: So I picked it up like, I don't know, 4 minutes later, then I ate it.

(Flashback: Ian picks up the muddy donut, and eats it)

Ian: I just don't understand how it got me sick though. I mean, it was well within the boundaries of the 5-minute rule.

Anthony: No, it's the 5-second rule.

Ian: No. no, it's..it's the 5-minute rule. I looked it up on Wikipedia.

Ian: What happened to your face?

Anthony: Oh, this?

(camera zooms in to the scratch wound on his face)

Anthony: Don't worry about it; it's nothing.

Ian: But I told you what I wished for on my birthday.

Anthony: Fine. So, I was playing with your cat. Then, out of nowhere he attacks my face. (Cat claws Anthony's face) And then he just went crazy on me.

(The cat tries to jump on his arm, Anthony moves his arm, causing the cat to flip. Screamo music plays in the background. Then the cat is shown holding a knife and Anthony reacts by moving himself to a kitchen counter, and the cat is now seen on top of the other side of the counter, knife still in hand. Anthony then reaches for a spatula to defend himself. Suddenly, the cat lunges at him, in which they engage in close range combat. Anthony then pins the cat down and slides him on top of the countertop, knocking a line of wine glasses and a Jenga tower in the process. Then, the cat pounces at him, in which Anthony dodges, which caused the cat to land in the microwave. Anthony then quickly shuts the microwave door and sets the timer to 40 seconds. 40 seconds after that, Anthony takes the cat out of the microwave so he can finish the fight with the cat. The cat then grabs Anthony by the throat, pushing him on top of the counter. Anthony noticed a boiling pot of water in on the stove, he then stuffs the cat's head into the water, drowning it.)

Ian: When did that happen?

Anthony: I don't know, like 10 minutes ago,

Ian: 10 minutes ago?

Anthony: Yeah, I'm surprised you didn't hear me out here.

Ian: And that pot right there?

(Shows the pot Anthony cooked the soup with)

Anthony: Yeah!

Ian: In this same soup, that you gave me?

Anthony: Yeah, I don't really see what the probl--OH SH--!

(Ian then barfs at the corner of the table)

(Then he sits up again, seemingly looking fine)

Ian: Hm.

Anthony: What?

Ian: I actually feel better now!

Anthony: Awesome! That means we can still go see "Disney on Ice"!

Ian: (confused) What?

Anthony: I said, that means we can still go see "Disney on Ice"?

Ian: Ooooh, I thought you asked if I still like steam rice!

Anthony: (amusingly) Wha-ha-What?!

Ian: (chuckles) Of course I like steam rice! (starts laughing)

(Anthony also starts laughing along with Ian. Then Ian is seen eating steam rice, and suddenly becomes frightened)

Ian: (Mouth full) Anthony, the cat! THE CAT! THE CAT'S RIGHT BEHIND YOU!!!

(The cat then raises the knife, in which Ian and Anthony screams, then camera shows the full shot of the house outside with screams inside)

The News
A newspaper then appears, with the headline saying, "TWO TEENS FOUND DEAD IN HOME." The caption underneath says, "Bodies found with multiple scratch wounds."

Suddenly, A close-up of Ian's cat holding a knife and wearing a Rambo uniform is shown whilst scary music plays. Before the episode ends, the scene quickly goes to Anthony staring in terror while the same music plays one last time.