Board Thread:General Discussion/@comment-79.101.199.57-20140318135655/@comment-93.87.252.207-20150729130451

OK, so - first idea:

Unemployed professional pantomimes(mimes for short)/ventriliquists (legit - diploma and all, four years of college and stuffs, master's degree in pantomimology etc. etc.). So they are desperate for money - right - they are literaly starving... So they discuss and come to this idea to become superheroes and earn money like that and remain professional pantomimes at the same time - some are reluctant because they are worried about their professional integrity and such issues (with pauses for fainting because of starvation in between concernings). They discuss and come to a conclusion that they all liked Power Rangers way back when (by the way - never watched the series - too annoying... and bizarre.. and morbid - I mean that main villain that looked like a red inside-out man with brain, wtf, the witch (...gee...), the blue ghost-like "Zordon" (right?) - like a morbidly obese man skidding his face all over some glass - nightmarish (ever seen x-files episode with the haunting Mars face (eariest stuff when I was a kid)) - hm - Power Rangers... I guess that it is one of those strange phenomenons when so many folks watch something religiously with no rational explanation (wtf...) (um... to fans: consider this a major TROLLING), and yea' - a Mexican male maid robot (funny? not.), those mud peoples (gray spandex clay men?) just need a *boink* or *dingily-bingily* sound when they jump like they are at the end of their nerves (assylum escapees); obvious CARDBOARD robots and buildings... and I guess every episode is the same - run around, say something bizarre and move accordingly annoying, merge, fight the giant, next episode, run around, merge, fight the giant... wtf... whatever. not comedic and not awsome - just sad; failed attempt of hummor; maybe it was fun for those who worked on it - but it didn't show through - I always flicked pass it on TV when I was a kid)

So that group of unemployed proffesional pantomimes create a superhero troupe and make costumes similar to but not the same as Power Ranger's (haha there's a piece of sketch right there about arguing about that) - and their helmets are similar but they reveal the lower part of their heavily white powdered pantomime faces with red blush and dark lipstick (how pantomimes do anyhow) and as pantomimes they do not speak so it's the same thing as power ranger's masks - their mouths are closed - immovable. Their spandexes are tight - very laughable design. And their junk pokes out comedicaly (put some additional stuffing). They call themselves: Pantomime Rangers (but the singers of their theme song mess with them constantly (and they get mad because of that and jump up and down, everyone for him/herself, and want to curse so bad until they're about to start having epileptic seisures but they don't want to break out of character and speak with their mouths moving). The theme singers sing: "Go go Powdered Wrenchers. x3. Mighty morbid Powdered Wrenche-e-ers.", for the next occasion they sing: "Go go Pantomime Retards. x3. Mighty farting Pantomime Reta-a-ards.", next time: "Go go Plunger Stenchers. x3. Gnarly MoFo Plunger Stenchers." and so on...) - they actually hire them and they stand nearby with all of their musical instruments, microphones and portable loudspeakers ready to get out from the bushes and do their jingle gig when they see the need (Pantomime Rangers don't have money for better ones otherwise they would fire them so badly), then when they finish the theme they go back to bushes to lay around drink beer and think-up what to sing for the next time.

Pantomime Rangers talk ventriliquistically (pretend that their mouth is closed yet talk) - funny scene: one of them repeatedly tries to tell something but the other just replies "Huh?" - after a while, frustrated, the first one says "F*** it, just add the dialogue in postproduction..". -"..Huh?". -"I said... $% look..." - he pantomimes what he meant - so it's frustratingly common that they do loads charades everywhare they go - and bystanders just look at them confused and angry and say -"WTF..." and throw stuff at them and yell "Boo! Go home! Rubbish!" - so the main one (the Red one ;) ) loses his temper and pantomimes something insulting to them after they fail to hear or interpret something along the lines of "We are your heroes, we are here to save you from these villains, stupid. And look how you thank us!". and they all sweat and their make up runs down in droplets and they have huge sweat marks and some of them have to go to toilet but when they come back they have yellow stains running down their shiny tight poliester xP spandex suits, some even have brown marks... and yea' the pink ranger... has old newspapers she found on the street taped to her crotch and is very moody - the others are honestly baffled.

Finally they encounter their foes - the the the clay men - the grey idiots what's their name - but they are even more ridiculous than the original ones from the series - making idiotic noises and having laugable "special" effects when they jump and to things and they move about in a variety of unusual ways - they roll like logs, jump like frogs, squiggle like caterpillars, have seisures, roll left and right etc. Pantomime Rangers just watch them confused and in disbelief, finaly after a lot of time just watching, the red Pantomime Ranger just pops the claymen one by one - alone; other Pantomime Rangers ventriliquistly say: "Man - what are you doing?" Red:"What?" Others:"We were supposed to fight them, man! You know - like ninjas!" Red:"Oh... ... ...Ooops. ... Am I red now in the face or what? I'm now all red because of shame. Well... This is awkward... Well - next time we'll fight them like ninjas. ...But you know this is quicker. ...Can't you see the poor clay things were suffering..." Others:"No bro! That ain't our style man..." Red:"But... We are rangers...a-a-a-and we are like cowboys - haha - like Chuck Norris... you know - bang bang huh.". The others cross their arms and nod in negation and sensing a migrane comming for them. (And generally the red one is triggerhappy and ultimately sooner or latter ruins every fighting scene - "Oh come one man!". Finally they take the gun from his hands: one of the other rangers says jokingly:"There! Now use your pantomime gun instead - ha!!" -"Hey - how am I supposed to defend myself now?" - "Defend?!? Is that what you call it? Is that what you call it?". So from now on it's OK - they fight awkwardly in their soiled spandexes, ...much later the red ranger is bored and curious so he tries his pantomime gun (just his hand in a glove) on the main bad guy just when he was getting into oration and braging how he's gonna destroy Pantomime Rangers - and it shoots like the real thing (flash and smoke and all) - and drops the main villan totally - everyone is surprised ecpecially the red Pantomime Ranger -"Wh.. Ho... I... How could I have known? Wh...") -"There he goes again..." -"Way to go... way to go..." - slow applause - shaming - "You spoiled it all for all of us!" - the red ranger goes away with his head bowed down with his hand still shapped like a pantomime handgun hanging sadly. But when he's gone the main villain gets up and says "Hahaha! How you all fell for it! Now I can get rid of you pesky Pantomime Rangers!" -Red is away, sitting on a bench in a park, after self-pitying he decides to take off his helmet - but can't - it's stuck on his fat noggin so he goes to his friends for them to help him - just then he sees them all tied - because the main villain got to them with the help of more of his minions who got out of hiding. Red (still unnoticed): "Now -- is my time to prove myself..." (while thinking that, he makes a lot of sensless and annoying unnecesary unneeded moves, plus with special sound efffects *whoosh* *whosh) red:"...I will fight him like a true Pantomime Ranger - like a ninja - with my hands and legs - the hard way - ! won't dissapoint my crew - they need me. Now more then ever!" (now doing "Makarena") - to the villain: "Hey you! ... um ....What ever your name is. - You forgot me!". The other rangers: -"Oh no, he is certainly gonna shoot them all now - I can't believe. I'm... I'm not..." - "Oh. This is so embaressing...". ...And so there is a lot of fighting between the red Pantomime Ranger and the main villain and his minions - first he defeats all his minions - the other Pantomime Rangers realize he is going to fight like a true Pantomime Ranger so they start cheering him. When he was about to engage in a fight with the main villain he runs away comically like he is a fancy lady ballerina hopping across the field and into the bushes. -Red:"Hey come back here and fight like a fair person!" - but he then senses it might be a trap so he runs back to first untie his friends. Then you see the main villain coming back in a trashiest possible painted cardboard box and plastic bottles five-stories(-like) high robot with hotglue all around gardenhoses and pantihoses and a vacuumcleaner hose and lederhosen withcarboard boxes for knees and feet, and a paste-on picture of some Mexican dude named Jose (we know cause he has a large ID card on his shirt pocket with "Jose" written on it) with sombrero and large mustaches, drenched in sweat, dressed in lederhosen vacuuming his front lawn grass, and with a waterhose stuck in his mouth cause it's hot like hell outside and he needs to stay hydrated, standing in front of 500 pantihoses drying on ropes. So basically now the Pantomime Rangers realise it's morphin' time and are all psyched about it - and now the ba-dum-tsss moment: because they are Pantomime Rangers they don't need no stinkin' boxes for their cardboard box robot - they are mimes - so they mime-in-a-box like they do. So their robot is invisible - you just see them sitting in ghost-chairs (blue-screened in a manner that is too obvious), and then there's a battle with a bunch of cheap special effects - like firecrackers and incense sticks and sparklers and they win and the villains robot explodes, crashes and burns (the villain ejects and farts off into the distance yelling "I'll get you next time Pantomime Rangars! And for god's sake put some deodorant for the next time, pelase!!"), and then the mayor gets out of a limo and hands the Pantomime Rangers a lot of money in a bag, PRs:"Thank you Mr Mayor!" - Mayor:"Why - thank YOU Pantomime Rangers - for saving the city. Now go have a bath you're stinking up the place.", *skreech*, PRs:"Good bye Mr Mayor!" - waving goodbye while flies buzz around them and multiple homless people passing by gagging and projectile vomiting ("Can you*UGHaa*... Ca*UUuu-UUUUUUGH*.. *spit* Can you spare a change for a ho*UGHOOAUAAAAAaAaAaAaAaA!!!!!*" *SPLATFSHHLYLYLYTSH!!*), the end.

(these ideas are free for takings by anyone, explicitly said, author, hereby.)