My Friend's Hot Sister/Script

At the house

ANTHONY

(tweets) Walking Dead marathon with my best friend (eats popcorn); #Best Day Ever.

IAN

Oh sorry, Antoinette wants to watch "Say Yes to the Dress".

ANTOINETTE

Yeah, I like the part when they say yes to the dress.

IAN

Me too, I like that part too.

ANTOINETTE

(giggles when Ian talked) Yeah!

ANTHONY

Are you dating my sister again?

ANTOINETTE

Ah yeah, but this time it's for realsies.

Ian

Yeah, forever and ever until the day you die.

<p style="text-align:center;">(Ian and Antoinette giggled and Anthony sighed as he walked somewhere else)

Later on

<p style="text-align:center;">Ian

<p style="text-align:center;">I like your eyes.

<p style="text-align:center;">Antoinette

<p style="text-align:center;">I like your nose.

<p style="text-align:center;">Ian

<p style="text-align:center;">I like your laugh.

<p style="text-align:center;">Antoinette (laughs)

<p style="text-align:center;">I like your nipple hair.

<p style="text-align:center;">Ian

<p style="text-align:center;">I like your butt chin.

<p style="text-align:center;">Antoinette: I like your stretch marks.

<p style="text-align:center;">Ian: I like your brows.

<p style="text-align:center;">Antoinette: I like your kan-coles.

<p style="text-align:center;">Ian: I like your sweat stank.

<p style="text-align:center;">Antoinette: I like your knee pit.

<p style="text-align:center;">Ian: I like your butt-crack hair. <p style="text-align:center;">

Later on

(Antoinette calls Ian)

ringtone: (sings) My Little Pony.

My Little Po...

Ian: (picks up the phone) Hello.

Antoinette: Hey uh just wanna tell you, I love you. (giggles)

Ian: (laughs) Ah, you're so cute.

Antoinette: Yeah!

Anthony: You guys just do that somewhere else?

Antoinette: You thought I was texting to be mean, huh?

(Antoinette and Ian laugh)

Anthony: Fine! If you guys are gonna be that way, I'm just gonna destroy your guys' relationship so I can get my best friend back. That cool with you guys?

Antoinette: I'm gonna go freshen up because I just realized I forgot to wipe. (gets out of the couch and leaves)

Ian: Okay. (laughs) Bye. (talks to Anthony) Dude, I think I'm ready to take it further with your sister. I mean like we've only hugged so far, but I think I'm ready to take it to the next level.

Anthony: Oh yeah. I think I could help you out with that. (laughs evilly)

Ian: What are you laughing about?

Anthony: Uh, I-I was just thinking of Dick Cheney as a kid.

Ian: (laughs hysterically) That's funny!

In the restaurant

(Anthony and Ian enter)

Anthony: Stop here. Take the ear piece.

Ian: Okay, why are you wearing that?

Anthony: Ah, my sister's here; you don't want her to recognize me, do you? Now remember, my sister likes to be treated in a very specific way, okay? So say whatever I say.

Ian: Okay got it. (goes to the table)

Anthony: Go get her.

Ian: Thanks man.

(Anthony laughs)

At the table

Antoinette: (gasp) Oo, I think I'm gonna have the pickled-pig's feet. Mmm nananum.

Anthony: (hides in the bushes near the entrance) Are you sure about that, you're practically a whale already? (laughs)

Ian: Are you sure about that, you're practically a whale already?

Antoinette: Oh my gee, I love whales. Thank you so much. I gonna hug so hard later.

Anthony: Son of a bitch!

Ian: Son of a bitch!

Antoinette: Wha?

(manager and police officer enters near Anthony)

manager: Ay, what are you doing in my restaurant?

Anthony: Oh nothing. I'm uh...

Ian: ...I'm going pee; I couldn't make it to the bathroom.

Antoinette: Ah, you poor thing. Come here. (hugs Ian) Oh.

Anthony: (grabbed by the manager and police officer) NO! GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME...

Ian: ...you ugly sack of s**t!

Anthony: I'LL BEAT THE CRAP OUT OF YOU IF YOU DON'T...

Ian: ...back off! Go away! Noooooooo!

Antoinette: Oo, you're playing hard-to-get, huh? I like that. Let's get out of here. (gets out of her seat and leaves)

Ian: Thanks Anthony, you're the best. (gets out of his seat and leaves with Antoinette)

At the house

Anthony: (tweets) Once Antoinette sees Ian act like a true pussy for he is, she'll dump him for sure; #Swag. (hears the door open and puts on his mask)

Antoinette: Yeah, but the brown ones taste weird.

Ian: Oh, those are so gross.

Antoinette: Yeah.

Anthony: (pops up with a potato acting it if it was a gun) Give me all of your money!

(Ian and Antoinette got scared, but Antoinette beat Anthony down)

Ian: I'm so scared Antoinette! (cries)

Antoinette: Ah, I like a guy that can show his feelings.

Ian: (exhales) Really? Does that mean you might want to take it to the next level with me?

Antoinette: Hecka, but take his wallet idiot; these Twilight shirts don't pay for themselves.

(They both to Ian's room)

Ian: (grabs the wallet and looks at Anthony's ID) Hey, that guy stole Anthony's wallet.

In Ian's room

Antoinette: Alright Ian, I'm ready to take it to the next level.

Ian: Okay, here we go. (plays a video game)

Antoinette: Oh, what are you doing?

Ian: Well I've been stuck on this level for a couple of days, I thought you could help.

Antoinette: You wanted me to beat a level in a stupid video game?!

Ian: Well, yeah. What else would take it to the next level mean?

Antoinette: Ah duhuhuhuh! (whispers what it actually means)

(Ian gets grossed out as he walked backwards out of his room to the hallway, to the front entrance and leaves the house, and then j-walks where he gets hit by a mini van)

At the hospital

Ian: (surround in casts covering almost his entire body) Ewewewewew! Actually, that doesn't sound too bad.

Alternate Ending
Ian: Ewewewewewew ah! Why chunky peanut butter? I hate chunky peanut butter.

Deleted Scene #1
Randy: How about this dress?

bride: Hmmmm, no.

Randy: Okay, (shows another dress) this one?

bride: (gasp) Yes! (jumps up and claps for joy)

Antoinette: (gasp) She said yes to the dress.

Ian: Ah, that's great.

(They both giggle)

Antoinette: It's per...

Deleted Scene #2
Anthony: Why do you guys have a picture of yourselves pooping together on Facebook?

Antoinette: You're just jealous of our love, idiot!

(Anthony closes the laptop)