REJECTED TWILIGHT ZONE EPISODES!/Script

Introduction
ROD

Over the years, the Twilight Zone has given you glimpses of the strange, alternate universe where things are not as they seemed. But some of those stories of the Twilight Zone never made it on the air. This is the Twilight Zone Rejects.

Men Have Boobs
Anthony: So Sydney has no idea it was Frank because (realizes the mid-age girl is staring at his boobs) MY EYES ARE UP HERE! (Throws down the coffee mug and runs off) PIG!

Moles Can Talk
Ian: Amy, will you marry me?

(Amy starts to take the ring)

Ian's mole: You know that's not even a real diamond, right? And he reads the Twilight books. (laughs)

Ian: QUIT COCK-BLOCKING ME, MOLE!

Last Person Alive is a Sex Addict
Ian: Hello? Is-is anyone looking to hook up? (Exhales) Now what? (Starts humping everything until he sees a blond girl he just humped) WHAAAAAT!

Girl Can Only Speak Lady Gaga Lyrics
(A girl comes up to Anthony)

Mid-age girl: Alejandro, I wanna take a ride on your disco stick.

Anthony: What?

Mid-age girl: I want your disease.

Anthony: Who told I had a...

Mid-age girl: I'LL FOLLOW YOU UNTIL YOU LOVE ME!!

Anthony: What the f**k, get away from me!

Mid-age girl: Caught in a bad romance.

A World Where Clothes Don't Fit
(The girl comes out of the closet with a small bra)

Blond girl: Not again! I can never get anything to fit. (Gets aggravated and starts to take off her bra)

(Ian and Anthony are recording her behind the dresses)

Ian: This is gonna make a great thumbnail.

A Man Who Doesn't Understand Idioms
Ian: Nah! Beetleborgs was way better than Power Rangers.

Anthony: You bite your tongue!

(Ian decides to literally bite his tounge and cause his mouth to bleed)

Ian: WHYYYYY! WHYYYYY! OH MY GOD WHYYY!

Humans Walk On All-Fours
(Ian and Anthony walk by each other)

Ian: Excuse me, do you have the time?

Anthony: Oh yeah sure, it's uh(a man's face walked by Anthony's butt) AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!

Anthony (singing off-screen): HUMAN CENTIPEDE!

A Man Can Only Hear Dubstep
(The ginger can only hear the people's voice changed to dubsteps and tries to commit suicide)

A Man Gets The Midas Touch
Asian girl: Everything you touch turns to gold. We're gonna be rich!

Anthony: Yeah, high five!

(Anthony highfives the girl and changed her to gold)

Anthony: Aaaaaaaw s**t! Well, since I'm all alone, (takes off his pants) I guess I might as well- (touch his penis turning it into gold) AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!

The Last Two Men On Earth
Ian: So we're officially the last two humans on Earth. What are we going to do now?

Anthony: Well, I guess we'll need to repopulate.

(They both start to make out with each other)

Ian (off-screen): NOT!

Pokemon Take Over
(Charizard wants to battle Mankey)

Charizard: Anthony, I choose you! (Throws the Pokeball)

Anthony: (Comes out of the Pokeball) Anthony! Anth-Anthony! Anthony!

A World Without Facebook
(Ian was reading an American Dictionary)

Anthony: Man, there's so much free time being productive.

Ian: I know! What did you do today?

Anthony: I solved world hunger and the energy crisis. What about you?

Ian: Cured cancer and AIDS.

Anthony: Man, life is so great.

Ian: I know!

(Ian and Anthony started to highfive each other in the air and a not allowed symbol covers them)

narrator: BEING PRODUCTIVE IS FOR LOSERS! Add us at facebook.com/smosh.

Deleted Scene
(Near the conversation)

Ian: Say, what ever happened to that girl you liked in high school that wouldn't go out with you?

Anthony: Don't know, don't care. Hey, what ever happened to your ex.

Ian: No clue; I just hope she's happy.

Anthony: Man, life is sure great.

Ian: I know!

(They both high fived each other while jumping)