9 Most Horrible Bosses/Script

9 Horrible Bosses You'll Experience in Your Life.

1: The Buzz Word Boss
The boss (Ian) is talking to a confused employee employee (Anthony).

Boss: All you need to do is individualize your teamwork and synergies the paradigm shift in osmosis marketing for all your cross promotions.

Employee: (confused) Wait, what?

Boss: Good talk, man. GAME CHANGER!

Narrator: The Buzz Word Boss.

The boss leaves leaving the employee confused.

Employee: (confused) Yeah...

2: The Bro Boss
An employee (Ian) is working on his reports and a football hits him in the face. His boss (Anthony) approaches him.

Employee: What the hell?!

Boss: Should've had your hands up, bro!

Employee: I think you broke my fricken' nose!

Boss: Aw, that's a bummer. You, uh, you got those reports that I asked for?

Employee hands him the reports.

Boss: Pound it.

Employee fist pumps the the boss and the boss imitates an explosion.

Narrator: The Bro Boss.

Boss: Might wanna wash your hands. You don't know where my fist has been. Alright. Later, bro.

The boss leaves.

3: The Tries Too Hard to Be Your Friend Boss
The boss (Anthony) rolls up in his chair up to his employee (Ian).

Boss: Hey, uh, dude, why haven't you accepted my friend request yet?

Employee: Because we're not friends.

Boss: Of course we are. Don't be silly. Come on, man. Let's go back to my basement; it's all tricked out. My mom could make us some eggplant lasagna with parm flakes. (Excitedly) Parm flakes! (Moans happily)

Narrator: The Tries Too Hard to Be Your Friend Boss.

The employee turns around and gets back to work. The boss looks over the employee's chair.

Boss: So, is that a 'yes?'

4: The Micromanaging Perfectionist Boss
An employee (Anthony) is trembling with a red stapler while the boss (Brittni) is monitoring him. The employee staples the papers and looks at the boss happily. The boss tosses the employee to the ground and knocks most of the stuff off of the desk.

Boss: GOD, DO I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING MYSELF??!!

Narrator: The Micromanaging Perfectionist Boss.

The boss sits in her chair and continues working on her laptop.

Employee: (Faintly) Oh, my dick.

5: The Pervy Pervster Boss
The boss (Ian) is walking by and is looking down the employee's (Brittni) shirt. The employee notices him.

Boss: Um, reports and stuff.

He pretends to leave and comes from behind a plant and continues staring. The employee notices him again.

Boss: Uh, s-shoes.

He bends down behinds the cubicle and creeps up. When he reaches the top, he notices the employee is gone. He then notices the employee next to him and clenches her fist.

Boss: (Nervously) Hi.

Narrator: The Pervy Pervster Boss.

Boss: (Quickly) I like your boobs.

Runs off.

6: The Doesn't Understand Technology Boss
An employee (Ian) shows his boss (Anthony) how to use his computer.

Employee: Okay, so if you wanna move the cursor on the screen, you have to use that white piece of plastic right there.

The boss picks up a stapler.

Boss: What do I do with this?

Employee: That's a red stapler.

Narrator: The Doesn't Understand Technology Boss

Boss: Computers are hard.

7: The Miiiiiiight Have a Drug Problem Boss
A female boss (Ian) is talking to her employee.

Boss: Uh, sweetie, do you think, maybe, I could borrow, like, $5000?

Employee: Sorry, I don't have that kind of money-

The boss grabs the laptop.

Boss: I NEED THIS MORE THAN YOU!!!!

Narrator: The Miiiiiiight Have a Drug Problem Boss.

The boss takes the laptop and knocks everything off the employee's desk.

Employee: Seriously?

8: The Video Game Boss
The employee (Ian) walks into a hallway with a cup of coffee and is confronted by the boss (Anthony). A health bar is displayed below him.

Narrator: The Video Game Boss

A choice selection bar is displayed below the employee. Four choices are toggled until the choice 'Request workers' compensation for a recent injury.' is selected.

Employee: So, I just hurt my foot. Can I get workman's comp?

The health bar is drained completely and the boss falls to the ground dying.

Announcer: Boss defeated!

9: The Super Hot Boss Everybody Thinks Would be Cool to Have But it's Creepy as F*ck When They're Actually Your Boss…Boss
An employee (Anthony) is opening an almond bar in the snack room when the boss (Brittni) walks up to him and grabs the employee's hand with the bar in it.

Boss: I like the way you use your mouth on that thing. Can I have a bite?

Employee: Uh, I actually gotta go use the, uh, bathroom. So...

The boss seductively takes a bite out of the bar.

Boss: (Mouthful) Can I watch?

Narrator: The Super Hot Boss Everybody Thinks Would be Cool to Have But It's Creepy as F*ck When They're Actually Your Boss…Boss.

The boss keeps chewing on the large chunk of the bar and makes the employee more uncomfortable.