Addicted to Honey Boo Boo Child

"Addicted to Honey Boo Boo Child" is a Smosh video and the first installment of the "Addicted" series.

Synopsis
In My Strange Addiction, Ian tells the viewers that people are saying he is addicted to Honey Boo Boo, which he says he is not, even though he has many pictures of her on every wall in his room. After watching Honey Boo Boo, Ian starts laughing at it, but when he sees the camera, he acts like Honey Boo Boo was so stupid. A black screen with "facts" appears, and the narrator says that Ian watches 5 hours of her every day which is 8,000,000+ hours a year. Without converting this quantity in any way, the narrator states that it is almost bigger than Texas and England combined.

Anthony is the only person who knows Ian's problem and invites them to talk about Ian. Two scenes show Anthony walking down the street and eating cereal without a spoon and drinking soda while watching TV. Anthony knows that Ian is addicted to her and says it is beginning to get worse, to the point where Ian even started to talk like her. At Bub's BBQ in Sacramento, California, Ian starts to order cheese balls after the waitress asks for Ian and Anthony's orders. The waitress couldn't understand what Ian was saying and he said it again while also showing his belly, demanding cheese balls. Ian starts throwing a tantrum, splashing his drink everywhere before the other employees had to come in and remove him from the restaurant. Another black screen appears; the narrator says that Ian eats 500 cheese balls a day, which is 20 trillion of them a year and some lions mate over 50 times a day.

Ian says that he is not addicted to Honey Boo Boo and saying he is always like this. The cameraman asks what Ian was drinking, which was what Ian calls his "go-go juice." The cameraman wants to know what is in it, which is "caffeine drink [coffee, or possibly an energy beverage such as Red Bull], soda, peanut butter, hot sauce, and a little bit of X-Lax." Anthony has decided to take Ian to get medical help for his condition. As Anthony was about to take Ian to get medical help, Ian tells Anthony he is dressed up as Honey Boo Boo ready to go to a beauty pageant and Anthony becomes disgusted, telling Ian he needs help. Ian did not feel like it, calling himself Ian Boo Boo Bear. Anthony felt confused, but Ian says it is his new name. Yet another black screen of so-called "facts" appears, and the narrator says that Ian spends 200 dollars per week on make up, which is enough to buy 560 pounds of chicken feed and adding that 99% of all Americans believed in everything they read.

Sharon has been brought to the house to witness Ian's addiction for the first time. She is seen with a shopping cart, making a wrong turn and getting stuck to the bottom of the edge. As Ian was posing like Honey Boo Boo, neither Anthony nor Sharon accepted what Ian has become, which Ian thought she doesn't love him anymore. At that point, Sharon hated her life and said, "F**k my life." One more black screen appears and the narrator says that she disowned him and in her sorrow, literally ate herself to death.

Anthony explains to Ian that he is dressed like a 4-year-old girl and is about to enter a beauty pageant, adding that people are going to think he is a pedophile. Ian starts to talk more like Honey Boo Boo, to the point where Anthony cannot understand what he is saying, but the viewer can because they were given subtitles. However, it gets worse when Ian starts talking gibberish, in which even the viewers cannot understand him, even with subtitles. In order to bring back Ian, Anthony says to him that he wants his best friend back, which Ian apologizes and they both cry like 4-year-olds. Anthony is delighted that he overcame his addiction and became his normal self again. As well, Anthony says he doesn't even know how someone could be addicted to "something disgusting". He says he wants to be done in order to see a film with his garden flamingo Steven.

The next scene is about Anthony and his relationship with Steven. He is seen going to bed with him and taking him for a stroll. Anthony complains about the cameramen doing an episode about him because he thought that "true love comes in many forms". He is even seen about to have sex with Steven.

Script
Addicted to Honey Boo Boo Child/Script

Trivia/Goofs

 * This video was released on Mari's birthday.
 * This Smosh video is a parody of Here Comes Honey Boo Boo.
 * My Strange Addiction and elements from it return in "My Twerking Addiction." This foreshadowed the future "Addicted to..." episodes.
 * The narrator states that 8,000,000 hours is almost the size of Texas and England combined. Hours replaced by square miles, it would be bigger than Texas and England combined, but it would only take 1,825-1,830 (leap year) hours for Ian to watch Honey Boo Boo 5 hours every day for a year, which, in square miles, is not even one-third the size of Connecticut.
 * There are 8,765.812 (approximately according to the Earth's revolution) hours in a year, making it impossible for one person to watch that many hours of television in a year. No person can live for 8,000,000 hours because 8,000,000 hours would last for more than 900 years.
 * The narrator also mentions that Ian eats 500 cheese balls a day, adding up to 20 trillion cheese balls each year. Even if Ian were to eat 500 cheese balls a day, that would mean that he would eat only 182,500 cheese balls a year (183,000 on a leap year).
 * If he was eating 2*10^13, or 20,000,000,000,000 cheese balls a year, Ian would eat about 54,794,520,547 cheese balls a day or 54,644,808,743 if it's a leap year. No person can have an appetite large enough to eat that much cheese balls.
 * POS is a parody of TLC.
 * Lions mate 1-2 minutes per day for up to 100 times and the gestation is usually almost 4 months.
 * Only 2% of Americans believe on what they read on the Internet.
 * Today, chicken feed cost almost 36 cents per pound without tax, which is $200.37 (still without tax) for 560 pounds of chicken feed.
 * The cart Sharon was steering was a cart from Target with the logo covered up.
 * When Sharon comes over and Ian does a twirl while wearing his dress, a censor grid appears under his dress for a brief second.
 * This is the second time Sharon died in 2012 (the first time being in "Food Battle 2012," though this time, it is only mentioned that she is dead and does not actually show her being dead).
 * This is the first time the characters do a high-pitch cry (imitating Honey Boo Boo's cry), the next time being "Japanese Titanic" and then "$10 QUEER EYE TRANSFORMATION (w/ Jon Cozart)"

Gallery
Photos: Ian "Boo Boo Bear"

Script
Addicted to Honey Boo Boo Child/Script

Subscription Ending
"Hey y'all! Thanks for subscribin'! Mmm-bub figgly foo squeemy jeemy!"

Shut Up! Opening
"I'm 6 and I'm a beauty queen! SHUT UP!"