PARANORMAL EASY BAKE OVEN!/Script

Introduction
Text: Smosh would like to thank the family of Anthony Padilla, Ian Hecox and the Sacramento Police Department.

Anthony: (recording) So, Ian! Uh, can you... explain why we have all this [pause] food (showing the lemon and blueberry cupcakes) here on the counter?

Ian: Er, ever since I found this little toy at our doorstep, we've just getting food randomly appearing here in the morning. It's kinda freakin' me out.

Anthony: (shows himself) Yeah, so that's why I've taken the liberty of [pause] setting up a few cameras around the house so, hopefully, we can find this ghost, or whatever's doing this.

(Ian eats the blueberry cupcakes that he is holding)

(CUT TO: Ian, walking down the hallway)

Ian: Alright, man, I'm goin' t' bed.

Antony: Wait, we gotta sleep in my room.

Ian: What?

Anthony: I couldn't afford enough cameras for both of our rooms.

(Ian sighs)

ANTHONY'S ROOM (01:25:10 AM)

Ian: We're cutting this part out, right?

Anthony: (in pajamas) Yeah, whatever, just go to sleep.

Night #1 January 11th, 2011
(03:20:25 AM)

Anthony: (in dream) Ugh, c'mon, baby, just-just one kiss.

(Ian shouts)

(The Easy Bake Oven's light switches on and Ian rises out of bed)

MORNING #2

Anthony: Ian! Ian, Wake up! (He sighs)

(Anthony holds Ian's nose)

Ian: I'M DROWNING! I'M DROWNING I'M DROWNING! (wakes) Dude, what the hell?!

Anthony: Dude, you gotta check this out! (Anthony goes to the computer monitor.) Look. I was lookin' over the footage from last night.

Ian: Right.

Anthony: Wa-watch what you do.

(Ian, still sleeping, rises out of bed on the recording)

Ian: What the frick!

Anthony: Yeah.

Ian: THE FRICK, I'M SO FRIKIN' SCURRED RIGHT NOW!

Anthony: Yeah.

Ian: LOOK AT ME I'M JUST- (smeling tacos) What is that incredible smell?

(Camera cuts to a plate of tacos on the countertop and pans to Ian)

Ian: Oh. My. Frick.

Anthony: You made a whole plate of tacos!

Ian: No, I even don't know how to make tacos. (share the taco) Dude, we gotta find out who's been making these delicious treats.

Anthony: Fine I'll just go set up a few more cameras, then.

Ian: Wait. I thought you said we couldn't afford more cameras. That's why I've been sleeping in your room the whole time. Right?

Anthony: (ingoring Ian) These are really good tacos.

ANTONY'S ROOM (08:03:10 PM)

Ian: Alright, no one crosses this Pikachiu. That's your side and this is mine.

Anthony: (wearing only pajamas pants) Alright. Whatever.

Night 2, January 12th, 2011
(09:52:15 PM)

Anthony: C'mon Ian's mom. A little tounge action.

Ian: WAIT! WAIT! WHAT WHAT NO! WAKE UP! WAKE UP!

(Anthony wakes)

Anthony: What's your problem?!

Ian: You just tried to make out with me! For the second time!

Anthony: Sorry, I was having a...weird dream.

Ian: About what?

Anthony: NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS! Go back to sleep!

(Anthony goes back to sleep. Ian shoves the Pikachu pillow between them.)

(THE NEXT MORNING)

Ian: What the f***ing frick? What is that?

Anthony: Well, It looks like a calazone.

Ian: I don't even know what that is!

(wacthing the Video)

Anthony: So, here you are getting out of bed.

Ian: What the FRICK!

Anthony: Just wait. And then you leave the house and then come back two and half hours later.

Ian: Wha-I got groceries?! What the frick! And I went to, like, 3 stores.

Anthony: Annnnnnd, Here you are making the calazone.

Ian: But-I d-It doesn't-DAGH!

BACKYARD

Ian: All this crap started when I bought this thing from that stupid old man.

Anthony: I thought you found it.

Ian: Okay, so, I might've made a blood oath with a Voodoo Priest but, you know what, it doesn't matter. (throw the oven to the trash can) Problem solved.

ANTONY'S BEDROOM

(Anthony is covering his bedroom floor with flour)

Ian: Dude this is the dumbest idea you've ever had. The ghosts are gone. We already threw the thing out.

Anthony: Well, we're gonna make sure their gone. Okay-If any evil ghost chef, or whatever passes through here, we're gonna be able to see it.

(06:14:00 PM)

Ian: This is so stupid dude! The ghost could easily jump over that line of flour.

Anthony: (wearing only underwear) Whatever!

Ian: Don't cross these pillows!

Anthony: Okay, just go to sleep.

Night #3 January 13th, 2011
(08:34:15 PM)

(squishing sound)

Ian: WHAT THE FRICK! WHAT THE FRICK IS THAT?!

Anthony: (wakes up) What?! What?!

Ian: That sound! It was like... (squishing sound)

Anthony: Dude, I didn't hear anything. Just go back to sleep. Just go to sleep.

(09:05:30 PM)

(Ian is dragged out of bed)

(9:05:27 PM)

Anthony: Oh my god! (seeing the flour line was seperated) Oh my god! IAN, IAN, WAKE UP!

Ian: What?

Anthony: HOLY S***T!!!

Ian: What? (see his face covered with flour with a mirror) OH MY GOD!!!!! I LOOK LIKE MICHAEL FRICKIN' JACKSON.

Anthony: Oh, C'mon he wasn't that white.

Ian: No, I mean I look dead.

COUNTER

Anthony: What the hell! (sees the oven is back in proper place) Di-did you bring that back in here?

Ian: No.

Anthony: Just tell the truth!

Ian: I'm being completely honest. I didn't bring it... (spot Allison's birthday cake)

Anthony: Okay.

Ian: What the frick is that?! That can't even fit in that little oven!

Anthony: What the h- Happy Bir- Who the hell is Allison?

Ian: I don't know!

Anthony: You know what- Here, that's it! (take out the oven)

MIDDLE OF THE STREET

Ian: Dude, Anthony! Where you going dude?

(Antony stops a random guy in blue truck)

Random Guy:  (muffled) GET THE HELL OUTTA THE ROAD!

Anthony: Want an Easy Bake oven?!

Random Guy: F**K YEAH!

Antony: Take it. (throws the oven in the random guy's truck)

(The random guy drives away)

Ian: So, That's it.

Anthony: I wanna film one more night. Just to be sure.

Night #4 January 14th, 2011
(04:17:10 PM)

(Ian sleepwalking )

Ian: (scared) AH FRICK! WHAT THE FRICK IS THAT?! ANTHONY! ANTHONY! ANTHONY!

(Anthony heads to the source and shouts)

(Ian comes back with a blood covered oven and cradles it )

(09:21:15 PM)

(a loud knock from police officer and crack it the doors house)

Police Officer: Police Department! If anyone is here show yourself! (in Anthony's room) Joe, I got someone in here. Turn around, (Ian wake up) and put your hand on your head

Ian: Anthony?

Police Officer : ' 'DO AS I SAY RIGHT NOW!

Ian: Anthony? (pulls out a crossant)

Police Officer: He's reaching for something! IT'S A GUN! (shoots Ian and realise that it was a crossant) Oh, nevermind. It's a crossant.(Eats it) WOW, he's a great cook

THE END

Easy Bake Freakout
(Fade in on the Easy Bake Oven, its light flashes as it speaks)

Easy Bake Oven: This is ridiculous, guys! I work my ass off on this set, and I can't even get a glass of water! This is B.S! I know I can't drink water 'cause I'm a frickin' oven, but I still demand it! RIGHT! NOW! SO YOU'D BETTER GIMME A WATER! YOU! OVER THERE! NO DON'T YOU JUST- DON'T JUST WALK AWAY! DON'T YOU JUST WALK AWAY! I AM A STAR HERE! I-I-Okay, guys, I'll give you one more chance before I'm calling my lawyer! And I'm gonna get him, and I'm gonna sue all your asses for bein' little Douche-Knockers to me! And I'm just gonna- I'm gonna put you in my oven and I'm gonna fry your ass, literally, and figuratively! Where's the director?! I need to speak with him RIGHT NOW-and-AND IF I DON'T SPEAK WITH HIM, I'M GONNA- I'M GONNA COOK SOME REALLY DISGUSTING COOKIES FOR 'EM! IT'S GONNA TASTE LIKE HITLER'S ASS! JEEZ, YOU GUYS ARE AMETURS! I'M SICK O' WORKIN' WITH THESE STUPID AMETURS! I AM A PROFESSIONAL THAT'S WHY I'M GETTING THE EIGHT DOLLARS NOW-!

(Anthony appears in the frame)

Anthony: JUST SHUT UP! I'M SICK OF YOUR CONSTANT BITCHING!

Easy Bake Oven: WHAT?!

Anthony: Alright, let's go have a little talk!

(Anthony picks up the Easy Bake Oven)

Easy Bake Oven: HEY! WAIT! WHAT'RE YOU DOING?!

(Anthony throws the oven in the trash)

Easy Bake Oven: YOU'RE GONNA BE SPEAKIN' TO MY LAWYER, YOU LITTLE PUNK

(Anthony shoots the Easy Bake Oven and walks away, thinking he's killed it)

Easy Bake Oven: I'M STILL ALIVE, YOU LITTLE PRI-!

(More shots are fired)

The End