MINECRAFT

Minecraft is the twelfth episode of Honest Game Trailers.

Script
From Notch, Sweden's biggest one-hit wonder since Peter Bjorn and John, comes a game like no other, unless you count Legos, Lincoln Logs, Mega Bloks, K'Nex, Erector Sets, or playing outside: Minecraft.

Play around with a virtual sandbox of Minecraft, a game made with the latest technology to look like it was made in 1992. Enjoy the full featured PC experience or the dumb-downed, impossible to control, cash-grab on consoles.

Enter a magical world of where the only limits are your imagination, and constant references to the wiki to figure out how everything works, and patience. (the player tries to chop down an obsidian block with a diamond pickaxe for ten seconds, which then breaks)

Choose whichever game-type best suits your play-style: creative mode, where you build and explore free from danger; survival mode, that adds monsters and hunger to the mix; or hardcore mode, where you combine the fun of the other two with cowering in the shack all night like a little bitch. (sings silently) Hush, little Stevie, don't say a word. Momma's gonna buy you a... (an enderman jumps near Steve) AAH!

Live to build another day by following some of Minecraft's most simple rules like don't forget to bring a torch, don't forget to cook your food, don't leave gaps in your shelter, don't go outside in a thunderstorm, don't look at the enderman, don't build your house in a swamp, don't attack more than one creeper at a time, don't forget to carry a bucket of water, don't go mining at night, don't use non-weapon tools in combat, don't waste high quality equipment on basic jobs, don't use diamond armor in the Nether, don't play around with fire, don't get to cocky, and never ever dig straight down... or up. (Stevie from lava twice by digging straight down and up) See? Simple.

Jump into a game that will give you panic attacks the next time you look at a sunset as night time brings out all kinds of dangerous monsters, but where the deadliest villains of all are other people. (a large amount of TNT explodes causing the house to get seriously damaged) Aw, not my house! You ass!

So prepare for an open ended game where you make the story that'll most likely be a story about a little, blue man who punches a tree, then punches some dirt, then ravages the countryside of a peaceful land and steals all of its natural resources to satisfy his unquenchable thirst for pointless construction. Wait, am I the bad guy?

Starring the crappy things you built like a hole, a table, and a shelter, sort of. And the epic things other people have built like Battlestar Galactica, the Mines of Moria, King's Landing, Mina's Tirith, the Space Shuttle, the city of Shanghai, and a working 16-bit computer. Are you s**tting me? Shouldn't this guy be out curing cancer or something? Minelegos.

(a Minecraft play set is shown) Shut up and take my money!