The Adventure Time Adventure/Script

In the garage

(Anthony crates a copy of Finn's hat)

narrator: (sings while Anthony builds) ''He's a badass man building a badass hat!  A badass man building a badass hat!  Badass, badass!''

(Anthony tries on the hat and laughs)

In the living room

Anthony (in the hallway): Guess what, man, I haven't slept in three days, but I finally(enters the room and gets surprised by Ian's hat)

Video game narrator: Press A to strip.

Anthony: What the hell is that?

Ian: What, my Finn hat? Oh yeah, I just found it at some thrift store down the street. Got it for like three bucks. Haha. Plus (takes out a replica of Scarlett) I found this sweet-ass sword in the gutter.

Anthony: It's like a perfect replica of Finn's sword.

Ian: Yeah, I know! I guess that means, um, you'll be Jake then.

Anthony: No, you be Jake.

Ian: No, you're gonna be Jake.

Stevie: I'll be Jake!

Ian and Anthony: F**K OFF, STEVIE!

Anthony: Fine, I guess we can both be Finn, but I'm gonna be a way better Finn than you.

Ian: Ah, haha. Okay, I think we're just gonna have to wait and see once a princess saving adventure comes along.

Sometime later

(Ian and Anthony just sit on the couch bored)

Anthony: Okay... Uh, we might need to create our own adventure, huh?

Ian: F**k yeah.

(Ian and Anthony fist bump each other)

narrator: ADVENTURE TIME!

In the neighborhood

(Ian and Anthony sing as they skip around the neighborhood)

Ian: We have the sword from Adventure Time!

Anthony: And really cool hats from Adventure Time!

narrator: (sings) Ian and Anthony are gonna have a really good time!

In the park

Anthony: Ah dude, look.

Roberto: (sings) Singing a song... (keeps singing)

Anthony: A princess in need of saving.

Ian: You sure? Just looks like some girl having a good time with her boyfriend.

Anthony: Come on man! Are we on a princess-saving adventure or not? Now help me create a disaster to save her from. (raises his fist) Nah!

Ian: (raises his fist) Nah! (fist bumps with Anthony)

narrator: MATHEMATICAL!

(Ian and Anthony set up a folded ladder while they laugh and Roberto sing)

Ian: Shh!

Roberto: You are my boyfriend and your so...

(Anthony cuts down the branch while laughing)

Roberto's girlfriend: AHH!

(the branch falls on Roberto)

Roberto's girlfriend: Roberto, Roberto!

Anthony: It's alright princess. You're safe now, thanks to me! (chuckles)

Ian: Uh, and me!

Roberto's girlfriend: (rushes to her boyfriend) Roberto! Strum twice if you're alive and once if you're dead.

(Roberto strums once and tries to strum again)

Anthony: (stabs Roberto with the Scarlett replica) Looks like he's dead. So how about that kiss?

(Roberto's girlfriend elbows Anthony's penis)

Anthony: OH DARN IT!

narrator: BALLTASTIC!

Near the house

Ian: (stops walking) What the hell? Who's parked at our driveway?

Anthony: Oh my glop, the Ice King. Looks like adventure has finally found us.

Ian: Rhombus.

(Ian and Anthony failed to fist bump twice)

Ian: (quietly speaks) Ow.

narrator: AWKWARD!

In the kitchen

(Ian and Anthony enter the house and meet the repair guy)

Ian: What are you doing in our house Ice King?

Anthony: Yeah. Whatever disasterly plot you're up to, we're here to thwart it.

Ian: Yeah!

repair guy: What? I'm fixing your fridge. You called me about it last week.

Ian: Ohhh, that's right. Yeah, so I kinda was getting some bacon pancakes and kinda cut the tu...

repair guy: Yeah, causing a lot of fumes to leak into the house. Have you guys been acting strangely the past few days.

A few days ago

Anthony: (struggles to put on a shirt like pants) These stupid pants won't fit over my cankles!

Ian: (acts like a robot nakedly) Error, error! One-one-zero-one (lands on the couch) error!

(Anthony still struggles with the shirt)

Back in the present

Anthony: Nah it's been a pretty normal week.

Ian: Now eat this Ice King! (takes off the repair guy's hat with the Scarlett replica)

repair guy: I'm not the Ice King, it's just the name of my company. Get it? I fix freezers. I'm the ice king. If I fixed sofas, I'd be the sofa king. (chuckles) Sofa king, get it, sofa king?

Ian: Yeah I get it, and that joke was "sofa king" stupid! (stabs the repair guy with the Scarlett replica)

Anthony: (gasps) Let's get outta here man, these fridge fumes are totally bunk.

Ian: Yeah. (fist bumps Anthony)

narrator: I THINK WE JUST KILLED A GUY! WE'D BETTER GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE SOMEONE CALLS THE COPS!

repair guy: What about me?

Stevie: Don't worry, I breathe fumes all the time! (inhales and exhales)

Outside of the house

(Ian and Anthony left the house)

Ian: Man, do you know what I learned today?

Anthony: Yeah. In life, you choose your own adventures and there's an endless bound of possibilites waiting for you right outside your door. Sure it's easy to think your life is boring, but you just need to get out there, and make the most of it.

Ian: No, that's not at all what I meant.

Anthony: Oh, I mean uh. You wanna go break some stuff in slow-motion?

Ian: F**k yeah.

In the garage

(Ian and Anthony break a ball of lettuce, tomato, four eggs, a container filled with eggs, and a container filled with jelly beans; Anthony is seen about to hit a nuclear bomb)

Ian: (talks in slow-motion) No, don't hit that nuclear bomb!

Anthony: (talks in slow-motion) I can't understand you, you're talking to slow!

Ian: (talks in slow-motion) I said don't hit that nuclear...

(Anthony hits the bomb causing it to explode and disintegrate Ian and Anthony)

narrator: NUKLEOMATIC! I'm a ghost.

Epilogue
(Stevie still breathes in the fridge fumes while the repair guy is seen dead before going to the hospital)

To See More and Thanks for Subscribing
Ian: If you wanna see behind the scenes footage and bloopers like this lovely clip, click the video on the left. To see us in an episode in Man at Arms where we smash a bunch of stuff with Jake's sword, click the video on the right.

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