Board Thread:General Discussion/@comment-79.101.199.57-20140318135655/@comment-178.222.225.80-20160222185741

There was a scene from some series (or a movie - I don't know) on tv today - a person made a deal and then spit to his hand to seal the deal with the other person. Well - there's an idea for a sketch - just exagerate it.

So in the sketch there would be two persons - making a deal - and then the first one (on the left side of the frame) would be enthusiastic about sealing the deal and then he would spit a quick tiny bit towards the palm of his hand and then extend his hand toward the other person - but he is a bit squeamish - thinking in his head: "Oh. Oooo-K. Why did he have to spit on his hand though... Gee. I mean. Well OK then." - and then he spits the same tiny bit like the first one did and extends his hand (I mean - it was unlikely that either of them actually propelled any actual spit - it was just a sound of tiny spitting), but then the first one moves back his hand and spits - now - two tiny spitworths to his palm and extends his hand, but then the second one lowers his hand in slight disbelief and we hear him thinking "OH! Now. I see how it goes..." - and then he spits three tiny spits to his palm and extends it to him again - then the first one takes back his hand and spits four tiny spits on his palm, and then the second one - five tiny spits, first one - six tiny spits, second one - seven tiny spits, first one - eight, second one - nine, first one - ten, second one - eleven, (faster and faster), first one - twelve, second one now goes for the thirteen but then in the middle of his spit counting the first one pulls a sneaky one to his own palm - the second one just finished his twelfth one but stops and lifts his head - having a serious expression on his face - eyes pointed at the first one - can't believe him (obviously getting pissed off) - but then the first one figures out (we hear his thoughts) "Oh sh** - that's thirteen - Unnn-lucky!" - spits one more to his palm for good measure (and has the awkward almost unnoticable grin) - and then the second guy, already at the end of his nerves (makes a face like he's gonna have an aneurysm or something), gains somposure, adds politely two more spittles to his palm (moving away like: "What you gonna do now? Go ahead make my day ... punk!") then adds one more, now the eyebrows on the first one flick up in a slight surprise (thinking: "Oh.."), then he adds two more tiny spits to his palm, and then the second one puts one more to his palm, then first one adds one more, second one adds one more, first one, second one (the difference being that now they just add one to own palm but don't extend hand to eachother because each knows what happens next so it's faster just adding one instead of counting each time) - so they go faster and faster - one each - additionally it's a staring competition - then the second one makes a pause for a bit - counts quickly on his fingers - nods - spits one again - faster and faster - one - one - one - one - one; now the first cheats - adds two, the second one notices but too late - he already made ones so he puts additional ones to counteract it retroactively, but then the first one starts spitting really fast so the second one can't count it - but then he does the same - and then the camera abruptly changes frame to a farther viewpoint - so you see an empty street (cloudy weather, a bit of wind) - everything is quiet - there's just two idiots on a road near the side of the road erratically making spitting sounds toward each owns palm; after a few seconds the camera shows the first one - now trying to spit super-fast - record breaking - the second one gets tired of keeping pace with him or trying to outdo him so he demonstratively now spits a real one in his own palm and gesticulates flamboyantly like "There! WHAT,  NOW?" - oh no you didn't, no you didn't, and the first one's like "Wh.. Well... Wh... OK." - so he squeezes one out and it drips in his palm and then figures - that's too much so he slurps some back clumsily [Don't film inside their palms at all - that would be too gross - just show their hands from the out side.] - so the first one says "Eeeeew that's nasty. ...Gross.", and the first one makes face and says "...What? ...You started it...", so the second one says: "OH!? OH??? So I started it?!" - adds one more real spitworth of it (in resentment and frustration), then the first one just "Mm-well.." adds quietly one more, then the second one makes a loud one more, first one quiet, second one loud, quiet, loud, quiet, loud - now they both are loud - and each spits to his own hand faster and faster, faster and faster, faster and faster, all of the sudden the first one *harks* and spits, the second one gets confused, thinks how unfair and stupid that was, nods his head in negation and has a grumpy face thinking: "That's... .." - but then he harks and spits in his palm, the first one again, the second one again, the first one again, the second one is running out of it - his mouth is dry - so he *snorts*, harks and spits, nods his head like yeah - points his index finger (his index finger and thumb making a letter 'L' for l'oser) to his other hand towards it repeatedly, like "Heck yea'. That's what you get. That's what you get.", but he gets moving too much so he turns his hand holding it but saves it (what reflexes!) - and the first one just turns his head to the side and says "O' man... that's just...", but then he snorts a hughest loudest one and spits it out in his cupped palm - the second one dry-heaves for a sec, watches in disbelief while the first one gloats saying "Huh!!? Huh!!? What you say 'bout THAT? Huh? Huh? Serves you right!" - and right then it spills over so he says "O' sh." and moves his feet out of its way clumsily (just as the second one was hopelesly spitting out in his cupped palm cause he felt a saliva rush because he was about to vomit BUT he didn't - he's o.k.) - and the first one didn't manage to avoid some of it eventually spilling on his sneakers so he says "O'! Oooo' man... Not my new shoes. Oh dammit." - so the second just nods slowly and says: "Serves *you* right... Serves YOU right..." - the first one watches it so he doesn't spill some more and then freezes thinking and than after a second he says: "What are we doing here?", the second one repilies pompously "Uh, if you remember kindly - we were sealing a deal here.", the first one quickly looks away, looks back, says: "... Wait what were we making a deal about again?" - second one: "Aaaa... Um.. Um.. .... Aaaaaaa.... ...AAA.. - it's on the tip of my tongue... a..." - he remembers it suddenly - "Yea' you was gonna sell me your new iPhone half the price and I was gonna throw in my collection of hilariously strangely shapped gourds.". Both wait for a half of second and then the first one all of the sudden says "DEAL!" and splats his hand onto the hand of the second dude and at that exact moment the sketch abruptly ends (just a blank screen). Haha. Yea' sure the first guy (left) was Ian, and the second one (..right) was Anthony, ok, whatever... :D

[you may freely use this comedy sketch idea without any compensation or credit, all just for laughs]