RESIDENT EVIL 7: BIOHAZARD (Honest Game Trailers)

RESIDENT EVIL 7: BIOHAZARD (Honest Game Trailers) is the 135th episode of the Smosh Games series Honest Game Trailers and was released on January 31, 2017.

Synopsis
(Shot of Marvel Vs. Capcom Infinite)

From a studio that isn't afraid to ruin their most popular properties, and the long running franchise about really bad neighborhoods comes a new chapter in murdering your ass until you like it.

Resident Evil 7.

Return to one of Capcom's most storied franchises that went from tense survival horror (clips of Resident Evil 1 and 3), to dumb fun action (clip of Resident Evil 5) to just plain dumb (clip of Resident Evil 6). Now experience yet another series reboot as you shoot zombies, pick up herbs and slowly open doors, but this time...in...first...person.

Enter a literal residence of evil and take over the disembodied hands of Ethan Winters, a husband searching for his wife in the world's creepiest house without calling the cops first in the most Silent Hill-ass plot imaginable as Ethan is kidnapped by a bunch of extras from a Rob Zombie movie and forced to find a cure to their serious mold problem in what has to be the roughest day in his life. (Ethan gets his hand chainsawed off by Psycho Mia who throws him to the ground) I want a divorce.

Thrill as Capcom combines the series' classic gameplay with every horror trope they can get their hands on, like the creepy house from PT, antagonist from the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, elaborate death puzzles from Saw, the little girl from F.E.A.R., and the jumpscares from every modern horror thing as you fumble around the dimly lit rooms of the Baker mansion while everything and everyone gets way to f****** close to your face. (Clips of people freaking out playing on PSVR are shown) Seriously, don't play this game in VR unless you've got a very strong sphincter. Trust me.

Prepare to squeal like a small child as RE7's opening leaves you weaponless, alone and in the dark, pitted against immortal enemies that are constantly searching for you as you creep through the house afraid of turning every corner...until you get a shotgun. Then throw all that carefully built tension out the window as the game suddenly becomes Resident Evil again instead of Clock Tower. Let's smash some zombies, nerds! (Clips of Ethan fighting against the Molded are shown) Whooo!

Revel in some RE nostalgia full of throwbacks to the classic franchise like: Fancy doors with overly complicated locks, grenade launchers just kind of lying around, really vague scary science, mashing up houseplants to make healing items, loose connections back to the franchise as a whole that we're not gonna tell you...

Lucas: I don't do spoilers.

And the most important feature of all...item management. Oh yeah. Now this is the Resident Evil I remember.

So click on that flashlight, reattach your foot with that good good healing juice, and enjoy a surprisingly solid horror experience and hopefully a brand new start for the franchise. Because as bright of a beginning as this seems, they'll f*ck it up eventually.

(Ethan is now on fire from the Happy Birthday trap)

Starring...

Master Hands (Ethan Winters), Bilbo Baggins (Mia Winters), Heresss John (Jack Baker), Spider-Mom (Marguerite Baker), Hillbilly Jigsaw (Lucas Baker), Winona Ryder (Zoe Baker), Ringu (Young Eveline), Granny Creeper (Old Eveline), Definitely lost the security deposit (The Molded) and Carl Winslow (David Anderson).

The Herbs Have Eyes VII

Did you know that the Japanese version is called Biohazard 7: Resident Evil? You're adorable, Capcom.