UNCHARTED

Uncharted is the 67th Honest Game Trailer.

Script
From the developer whose name made a lot more sense when they were making goofy platformers about animal men (Naughty Dog) comes the series that dared to ask "What if Tomb Raider was a dude?": Uncharted.

Enter the world of Uncharted and get ready to take on devious puzzles, dangerous enemies, and a truly unreasonable amount of climbing. And now you can experience it all in slightly higher definition, unless your mom wouldn't buy you a PS3; then you've never played any of this stuff. Man, isn't being an adult great?

Dive into a series that convinced Naughty Dog to stop making whimsical games about bandicoots and start making games about guns, ladies, and one-liners, as you experience some of the most impressive presentation ever to be wrapped around an average third-person cover shooter, featuring the original game that set the standard in the action genre for storytelling, set pieces, and fat suits (Uncharted: Drake's Fortune); the sequel that blew everyone's expectations out of the water with bigger and better everything (Uncharted 2: Among Thieves), and the third game that, uh, just kinda made par (Uncharted 3: Drake's Deception). But the part on the sinking ship was pretty cool, right?

Immerse yourself in the rich storyline of the Uncharted franchise, where you'll take on the role of Drake, a wisecracking thief who started from the bottom, now he's here, and embark on a series of globetrotting adventures alongside sidekicks, mentors who are too old for this sh*t (Sully: I'm too old for this bull***!), love interests (Chloe Frazer), and other love interests (Elena Fisher), then battle against a variety of nefarious villains in plotlines worthy of a Hollywood movie, until everyone turns into zombies or mutants or something in the third act. Spoilers!

Prepare yourself for some of the most thrilling and least interactive action sequences video gaming has to offer, where you'll perform death-defying feats by holding a direction and occasionally tapping a button, in the modern equivalent of Dragon's Lair. Then push yourself through the standard third-person cover shooting, puzzles where they give you the solutions, and endless hours of climbing (Chloe: And still more climbing./Nathan: Yeah, that's usually how it goes), until you get to the next awesome set piece. (Nathan and Sully run as explosions erupt behind them) Awesome!

Strap in for the multiplayer that no one was really asking for until they started giving it away for free, where you'll remember that the shooting is not the best part of these games, and experience the mode so tacked-on that they forgot to put it in the Collection. So sit back, relax, and dig that ancient Mayan statuette out from your underwear drawer, and get ready to experience the series that's almost the pinnacle of cinematic action gaming, because Last of Us 2 still hasn't been announced yet.

Starring Indiana Jones (Nathan Drake), Skeezy Burt Reynolds (Victor "Sully" Sullivan), April O'Neil (Elena Fisher), Girl Drake (Chloe Frazer), British Drake (Harry Flynn), Jason Statham (Charlie Cutter), Vaas (Atoq Navarro), Bane (Zoran Lazarevic), and Helen Mirren (Katherine Marlowe).

Charted: Naughty Dog's Fortune.

(Nathan, Elena, and Sully stand around a well)

Sully: Well, well, well.

Nathan: Ha ha, that's cute.

Elena: What?

Nathan: Because it's a well.

Changed my mind. F*** this game.