User blog:Paralie Marquena/Fan Fiction: The Wedding That Never Got Called Off

Many Smosh fans knew about Anthony's ex-fiancee, Kalel. She was in Smosh videos. Smosh fans and haters alike read about the breakup, or watched it unfold on Instagrams.


 * This is a fan fiction concerning an alternate reality.  Curse words will be written as ****.


 * September 5th, 2015; 3:44 P.M.:

Kalel stood in front of the bathroom mirror, her face contorted into a sneer:  Discontented with her look.

 * "I look terrible today, Honey."  Anthony came up from behind her and poked the top of her head.


 * "You don't have to look perfect for a Smosh video."


 * "I know, but..."  she looked back at him.  "even you aren't denying it."


 * "Because I know you'll disagree."  He gave her a smooch and reached to the side of the sink.  "I gotta shave."


 * Kalel giggled.  "Now who's being ridiculous?!"  Anthony laughed in response.


 * "Hair shows up on camera.  And I'm ugly as **** and you're beautiful."  Kalel seemed to take Anthony's words into consideration and she turned back to the mirror to study herself, Anthony putting shaving cream on his hand.


 * "Okay.  Give me 15 minutes.  I think I have a few ideas."  Anthony gave her a kiss on her cheek, getting her soft hair stuck a bit on the moist innards of his lips.  It was the little things.  He smoothed the foam on his face, taking quick glances at Kalel, who looked like a live painting.


 * "I'll be Skyping with the crew, seeing how the shooting is going."


 * "Oh, I have to call Alec.  Plan our trip..."  She rolled her eyes.  "And by trip, I mean go here, shoot, go here, shoot, run lines again, shoot,and then we go back to the hotel where you and Bethany are waiting."


 * "Babe, I told you I might not be able to make it to San Fran."


 * Kalel smiled, uncapping some eyeliner.  "You will."


 * "I couldn't even make it to Thanksgiving.  I picked you up and said hi to your parents and brother."  He paused.  "Literally."  Anthony then proceeded to pick up the razor.


 * "That was kinda funny,"  Kalel said.  "But that was almost a year ago."


 * "Time flies."  Anthony remarked.


 * "Ain't that the truth.  Ain't that the truth..."  Kalel was lost now in contouring her eye and Anthony gave a little shrug and began swiping the razor.


 * 15 minutes later, Kalel had the bathroom to herself, listening to Anthony talk to Noah and Ryan.  As she had told Anthony, she was done, and she could not help but stare at herself for a little bit.  Her makeup was on point and she looked like a pinup model.  She smiled at her reflection and then when she'd had enough of her self-indulgence, she tidied up the bathroom area and went outside, leaning against the bathroom door frame.  Anthony would see her and drop what he was doing.  She knew it, and she could not wait.


 * As she suspected, Anthony's mouth dropped open and he hastily shut off a conversation with Noah and slowly got off the bed.


 * "Kalel,"  he murmured.  "My gosh.  You look..."


 * She could hear him breathing.


 * "Breathtaking."  He slowly walked, never taking his eyes off her.  "If Paula touches one spot on your face, I will kill her; I will bury her; you just tell me where to put the body."  Kalel burst into laughter and Anthony continued to slowly walk over.


 * "How did I get so lucky,"  he said softly, once he reached her, able to touch her.  He could not kiss her, so he took the back of his hand and ran it on the side of her face; on her ear; her silken neck.  "I guess we are ready."


 * "Yeah, 'cause if we don't leave we're just gonna ****,"  Kalel joked.


 * "Yup."  Anthony took her hand and she dragged him over to the nightstand to grab her purse.


 * After a long car ride in traffic, Kalel hiding in the backseat, they pulled into the "Smoffice," where she immediately sat up and fluffed her hair, Anthony letting her out and putting his arm around her waist.  And like that, the couple entered.


 * Ryan Finnerty, Shayne and Joe Bereta were in the room to greet them.


 * "Hey, you two,"  Ryan said, coming over.  "You guys ready to shoot this?"


 * "We are."  Anthony said.


 * "Just...not ready for the backlash,"  Kalel said.


 * "Small...small price to pay,"  Anthony said, looking at her.


 * "Okay.  Well, Kalel, you look beautiful.  Anthony, you look great.  All we have to do is get you two in front of the camera."


 * "Ian's here, right?  I don't know why I'm asking; of course he's here.  Um, where is he?"


 * "Hanging out with Keith in the editing room,"  Shayne said.  "I was just there."  Ryan and Joe then took Anthony and Kalel to the set.  It was a simple setup, with fake windows for aesthetic and soft white lighting.


 * "Nice,"  remarked Anthony.  "Very nice.  Alright."  He began leading Kalel forward.  "Let's do this.  Possibly the most offensive video Smosh will ever put out."


 * "Yep."  It was all Kalel could think of to say.


 * September 5th, 2015, 5:55 P.M.


 * ACTION!

"Hey!" Kalel and Anthony said at the same time into the camera, smiling.

 * "You're probably wondering:  Kalel and Anthony, are they back together?"  Kalel hammed.


 * "Are they cheating on Miel and Alec?"'


 * "Is this even real life?"  Anthony did not even have to force a laugh then.  Kalel said even better than in line readings.


 * "We never broke up."   Anthony said.  "Guys, we just needed some serious privacy off-camera.  We sat down for dinner one day and the subject came up and we decided to make it happen.


 * "We ae sorry for lying to you,"  Kalel said.  "I know, some of you watching this are like, "what's new?"  Kalel nodded and gave a wry smile to the camera.  "I know, guys.  I know."  She and Anthony paused.  "Anyway."


 * "This video is your official notice that we will be live streaming our wedding.  October 10th, 4 p.m. Pacific time.  Below you can find a link where you can convert that to your time.  And again, we are sorry."


 * "But then again,"  Kalel said.  "We also aren't because we needed this.  And we're glad we got to have the last year before the wedding to plan things in peace.  It's not that we don't love you guys, but planning a wedding and even being a couple in front of millions of people can be sort of stressful."


 * "Yeah.  No aspersions on anyone.  Not trying to offend or demean anyone.  We promise.  We love you guys; we love WULAS."


 * "We could have just said we needed privacy, but then you would have been bored, asking for vlogs, so we decided to go this route,"  Kalel said, looking quickly to Ryan, who was smiling in approval.  "But at the same time, it's also hard to explain why we decided to do what we did."


 * "We weighed all the options,"  Anthony said.  "And in the end, we hope you'll be happy that we are getting married."  He turned to Kalel.  "We really sold our fake breakup, didn't we?"


 * "And I think we have some people to thank,"  Kalel said with a smile, signaling off-screen Alec and Miel.  "These two are awesome people.  Miel is one of our friends we met a while ago and Anthony became fast friends with Alec actually around the time we made the breakup video.  Alec, Miel, we thank you guys so, so, so much, for putting up with everywhere we dragged you to, made you do, all the crazy ****."  And Kalel broke into hearty laughter.  


 * "Yeah, like that time you made me dress up like a clown and strip to my skivvies."  Alec joked.


 * "That- that never happened,"  Kalel roared.  And everyone chuckled.


 * Miel had her own barb prepared.  "Going overseas with this guy was just...just painful.  Hated all the sites we saw.  And all he did like 95 percent of the time was text Kalel."  Anthony laughed.  


 * "And 95% of the time, she was texting her boyfriend."  Anthony gave them small hugs and arm touches to send them off-screen as Kalel talked.  


 * "Anyways,"  Kalel said.  "We love these guys.  October 10th.  In 2 days! Save the date, guys!"


 * And again,"  Anthony said.  "We're sorry; it's just something we had to do as a couple."  He leaned into Kalel and gave her a kiss and their eye contact lingered.  And Anthony pretended to whisper something to Kalel and watched as she pretended to whisper to him.  Then they both turned to the camera.


 * "BYE!"


 * "Perfect."  Ryan said.


 * "That was good,"  Ian said.  "Obviously it won't go over with everyone, but what can you do; you guys still did a great job."  Ian looked down at the ground for a second.  "I bet people will wish it was like that with me and Mel."


 * "They might actually think it is,"  Anthony said.


 * "So, it's over,"  Joe said.  "How does it feel?"


 * "We wait,"  Kalel shrugged.  "And hope."  She looked at Anthony.  "And get back home."


 * The couple both winked at each other.


 * "I'll supervise the editing, since this video directly concerns me.  But first..."  Anthony suddenly picked up Kalel, who cried out in excitement and got her on his back and began running, hearing laughter behind him and a "Go Anthony."  He stopped running in a corridor and let Kalel slide off his back. He grabbed her and then wrapped his arms around her figure and gave her a passionate kiss.   "I've been waiting for a while to do that.  I love you Kalel."  She smiled and wrapped her arms around him, feeling tears of happiness begin welling, taking in all that he was.


 * "I love you too, Anthony."  And they stayed in that embrace for a while before beginning to walk to the car and arriving back at their apartment where they would make love for hours and fall asleep comfortably beside each other.


 * THE END.