Board Thread:General Discussion/@comment-79.101.199.57-20140318135655/@comment-109.93.35.149-20150708195907

One more one more: if TV remote had a button which when you press it - it's similar to that picture-in-a-picture thing where there's a person who translates what's said into sign language for viewers who are deaf or weak of hearing, EXCEPT he instead interprets (says plainly) the message behind the message of what person on TV is saying (what it, like ...transposes to ...right?) - and he is all professional and cool and almost scientific about everything he says (like David Atenborough - yea', that's it exactly).

This one's most likely twighlight-zoney, halloween-type material.

So the sketch video would go like: the duo surfs through tv channels and stumbles across some obscure news tv station and some boring looking conversation dialog trialog is going on between some fine gentlemen and a show host but unlike most of the time Ian doesn't flick onward past it - he decides to try to listen and after an almost too long pause he says: - "O'. Bo-ring!! I hear a lot of yapping.. - but what does this all MEAN?" - "Well.. why don't you just press the 'What-does-it-mean' button." - "Wha.. Where?" - "Right there on the remote, man." - and so he does, and then that David-Atenborough-looking character in a vertical ractangular box slides left into the lower-right corner of the tv screen (but because it's not actually a person but a CGI - he is buggy (rarely though) - something like that Max Headroom character, but no graphics behind, just, like: an old guy in white/lightly-colored suit with a tie and blue background). And so (maybe after a short but sweet commercial break which turns out to be something completely different from what it is - when it gets 'transmessaged' - and the duo gets a couple of chuckles from it), you first hear the show host welcomin the viewers back (interpreter interprets his words as well - he eloquently puts it: "I'm just an idiot who doesn't understand what's actually being discussed here and I'm looking forward to a date with the weather girl from the 6 o'clock news."), and then there are those two fine gentlemen discussing calmly and eloquently and rationally, and then equally calmly the interpreter says what it on the other hand MEANS - and it turns out to be totally opposite of how it sounded - so Ians' eyes go wide open when he got hit with it and says with a sick surprised smile: "Whoooa!! It all of the sudden got interesting!" - and they both listen to it with eyes wide open and with disbelief on their faces and snacking on popcorn and looking - left - than right - then left again (as the fine gentlemen exchange arguments) - like it's a freaking tennis match, and what it interprets to, it turn's out, is basically - а gang talk - full-blown gloves-off agressive argument - horror like). Anthony is like: "O' no he di'n't! No he di'n't!", Ian is speechless - his mouth open - popcorn falls out. Then the show brings in the vidеo box of the third gentleman to join the conversation (Ian (with outmost dismay): "Who the heck is this guy!") and then he goes on and on and on - also something totally rational and gentlemanly looking, Anthony - impatient, spining his index finger - like - "Fast Forward that tape man", "Yeah? Yeah?", Ian in the meantime even more impatient and hovering above his seat:"O' no, what does this all mean? I'm freaking out man, 'm freaking out!!" - suspense - all of the sudden some geeky skinny character, their friend, with VERY thick glasses and (false and overdone) buckteeth - looking like Waldo opens their front door - startles them - and strolls into their house, Guy: "Hi guys!" - I&A: "Whoa!", A:"Jesus, man, don't you knock?", Guy (Woolly): "Ahahahaha - what'yer doin' guys?", I&A:"Shut-up Woolly - we're watching some obscure news channel!" - Woolly: "Some obscure news channel??? Why would you watch that boring old crap?!? Isn' there 'Game of Trones' on or something!" I&A:"Shut up just shut up man! ..Huh. *gasp* Listen.". The third gentleman concluded and now the interpretor is interpreting it nicely - and it turns out it's something so nasty I&A totally flip their lids and then they face eachother and yell "AAAAAAAA!" to their outmost horror and stat thumping their allstars sneakers realfast to the ground like they need to run; all the while: Woolley, sitting there beside two of them on that leather couch - unmoving with the expression of curiosity 8. from when he started listening the tv - soils himself so freakin' loudly - so much so that the mound of poo lifts him a foot above his seat. I&A - freaking out and yelling in disbelief to all four sides of the world; finally - Anthony grabs Ian by shoulders:"Wait man - didn't he say the place where we are right now???", I:"O' man, o' man.", both: "AAAAA! Run away!" - now you only hear I&A running clumsily to the car, dropping keys, yelling in panic, turn on the car, tires screeching, driving away in a hurry, knocking some trash cans - all the while we only see a still frame on Woolly sitting there on a mound of poo still unmoving and with that curious blank face - then a pause - and then cut to the scene of a giant mushroom. I&A: finally breaking the car, getting out of the car and looking back. I: "O' man.", A:"That was a close one!", I:"What the hell just happened??". At the end a twilight-zone-type narrator - but in a suit coat made of rigid cardboard-box cardboard painted white with drawn black lines and with a black drawn tie - walks into the frame with Ian and Anthony behind the car in the background (he's unnoticed by the two), and says: "And thus concludes another episode of the... aa... aaa... different show from the one we can't mention because of copyright issues."; stands; grins; stands awkwardly some more; walks out of the frame.